


After

by shethenightwolf



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Brother-Sister Relationships, Cowboys & Cowgirls, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff and Smut, Jealousy, Love, Original Character(s), Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-07
Updated: 2020-03-22
Packaged: 2020-04-12 10:07:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 23,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19129867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shethenightwolf/pseuds/shethenightwolf
Summary: Arthur confronts Micah on the mountain and after that, he somehow manages to escape. He comes back to the place he has never thought he’s gonna go back to - West. He’s hiding in plain sight, trying to figure out what to do with his life; all his friends think he’s dead, but the world turns out to be smaller than it seems to be. And it looks like the demons of the past will never stop following him and you’re the one to find this out really soon.





	1. What lies ahead

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, so it was a spontaneous idea that turned into a plot. I would like to say, in this story, Arthur was never sick. I said no to tuberculosis.

Many things happened that day, on that mountain. Arthur Morgan, a member of Van der Linde gang was dead. He died the moment his closest friend, Dutch, turned his back on him and walked away, leaving him behind. Like all these years they’ve spent together were nothing. Like everything they’ve been through together didn’t matter at all.  

His old life ended that day. He was free, but he was left on his own. No place to go, no people to go back to. It was too soon to go and find his friends. They were still outlaws with prices on their heads and he knew the wisest thing to do was to lay low for some weeks or even months… He just needed to wait it out. 

He thought he would never see West again. Oh, how wrong he was. That was exactly where he was going to. To the place where he was feeling the most alive. West. 

However, Arthur was hurt. Not only physically, but also mentally. He felt betrayed. After all these years he spent running with Dutch, he got betrayed. It was painful and the worst was that no one was going to give all these years back to him. Though they weren’t wasted - he wished he could’ve changed some things. He wished he had been a better man. But it was all just a wish. 

He stole a horse and rode for days till he found himself near the Blackwater. It could be a good place to start with. Hiding in plain sight was something he would’ve never thought he would do. But the words were spreading fast - and soon everyone would know there wasn’t such thing as Van der Linde gang anymore.

He had to wait it out or he just kept telling himself that. Then he could go and try to find his friends… Because when he was alone out there he felt lost. He felt lost like a child whose mother died, whose father was a bad man… A child who has always been on his own. All these memories were back and they were killing him. He had to find something to do, to get rid of these thoughts. Some place to go, a destination, because sleeping under the stars and a pointless journey started to overwhelm him. 

_Old Arthur Morgan was dead. What was the new one up to?_

He was travelling on his own for some time, taking his time to adjust to a completely new situation. All his old life was gone and he had no clue what to do next. He’s been an outlaw for so many years, he almost lost his hope that anything can change.

Until he met you.

A stranger who was lying crushed by a horse in the middle of one of the roads leading to Blackwater. You cursed under your breath, feeling desperate as never before. Why did it have to be you? Your leg hurt a lot when you tried to move, the pain spread all over it. For fuck’s sake. Not mentioning the sun. It was shining so hard, making the temperature so high it was almost impossible to breathe. 

“Do you need some help?” A low husky voice surprised you as you were struggling beneath your horse. “Looks like you could use a hand.”

“I’m fine…” You replied, but then raised your eyes and saw a man standing over you, his arms folded as he was looking at you with pity. “Okay, maybe a little help would be needed.”

The man chuckled and crouched next to you, lifting the dead body of your horse a little so you could take your leg from there. You wanted to stand up but as soon as your feet touched the ground, you felt an enormous pain in your left ankle. You staggered, but before you could fall back on the ground, he grabbed your arm and helped you stand still.

“I must’ve hit my leg harder than I thought…” You murmured, feeling almost sorry for yourself. “Thank you for help, mister…”

“Arthur. Arthur Morgan.” He introduced himself. 

“Mister Morgan.” You smiled through the pain. “I’m Y/N. Y/N Blackburn.” 

“Do you need a ride?” He asked even though he knew the answer. You were out there without a horse and your house was a good few miles away. Theoretically, you could make it there yourself, but considering your current state it might’ve been difficult.

“I barely know you…” Your cautiousness was stronger than common sense. “How can I know you won’t hurt me?” 

“Suit yourself,” He said, shrugging and turning his back towards you. “Just wanted to help.”

“Hey, wait up!” You waved your hands in the air, trying to balance as you were standing on one leg. “I could use a ride, okay?”

Arthur chuckled, turning around to you and a second later you were in his arms, your legs swinging in the air. He lifted you up effortlessly without any warning but held you tight as he was expecting you to resist. “Relax. How am I gonna give you a ride when you won’t mount my horse with that sprained ankle? Yeah, I saw your face when you stood on the ground - I can bet you sprained your ankle.” 

He helped you mount his horse, being extremely careful not to cause you any more pain while doing so. When you were already there, he mounted his horse himself, sitting behind you in the saddle. 

“Where to?” Arthur asked after you had started to ride. 

“There’s a farm nearby, just keep riding straight for a while.” You explained, your eyes focused on the road ahead of you. “I will keep you informed.” 

“Alright. Meanwhile, do you mind telling me what happened to your horse?” He tried to keep the conversation going. “Also, are you always so self-sufficient, even when it’s obvious you won’t manage on your own?”

“I don’t think I’m self-sufficient… I… Just don’t really trust strangers, okay?” You tried to explain yourself and your irrational behaviour. _Who with the right mind refuse help when it’s needed?_ “About my horse… It’s not actually mine. It’s my brother’s… Was my brother’s.”

“Ouch. I guess he will be pissed about it.” 

“He will have to deal with it. If it wasn’t for you he could lose a sister too, so I guess it wouldn’t be this bad.” You shrugged then realized your interlocutor was laughing behind your back, so you turned your head to look at him. “What?”

“Nothing, it’s just… I like your attitude.” 

“Thanks.” You smiled at him then go back to observing the road.”Turn left on the crossroad.” 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

“So… Now I have a question. What are you doing here, huh?” You asked and he took his time to think of the answer. 

“Let’s say… I was just passing by… I don’t know, actually. I’ve been travelling for a while now, searching for something… But I haven’t found it yet.” 

“And what’s that you’re searching for so fiercely?” 

“I guess I will know that when I will have already found it.” 

You chuckled in the response and he slowed his horse down, making you turn to him again. “Why are we slowing down?” 

“Why are you laughing at me?” 

“I’m not laughing at you.” You explained. “I’m laughing because I like your attitude too. And I kinda wish I could be as careless as you’re. Oh, now we have to turn right, yeah, right after this big tree.”

“I’m not careless,” Arthur said, following your directions. “It’s just… My life has changed in recent months. Still, I’m trying to figure out what to do next with it. It’s harder than I thought, you know? Why am I even telling you this?” 

“I don’t know, I guess… It’s purifying to talk to someone about your struggles.” 

“Huh, that can be true.” 

You kept riding as the sun was shining mercilessly and the lack of wind was making it hard to breathe. Soon, your skin became wet and drops of sweat started to stream down your forehead. You washed it with your head and brushed it against your shirt, sighing heavily. “Damn it’s so hot today.”

“Yeah, no wonder why you’re horse passed out there,” Arthur said and you could feel he was washing away the sweat from his forehead too. “Is your house far away from here?” 

“No, we will soon be there.” 

A wooden house appeared on the horizon the moment you stopped talking, giving you hope you won’t melt from heat before you get there. In a few minutes, you were already there, on the small ranch your father built several decades ago. Arthur just stopped his horse when he heard the sound of a loaded gun behind his back.

“Stop right there, friend.” He looked at you questioningly. “Y/N, who’s that?”

“Spare it, Jamie.” You turned to the man who was pointing the gun at Arthur. “And lower your gun, you won’t shoot your sister, will you?”

“I won’t shoot you, but your companion - maybe, I will have to think about it,” Jaime replied, but after a few seconds, he lowered his gun, just as you asked him to. “Who is he?” 

“Arthur.” He had introduced himself before you managed to do it for him. “Arthur Morgan. I found your sister laying crushed under a horse, I thought it would be nice if I helped her get home safely.” 

“Jaime Blackburn.” Your brother huffed then smiled gently at him, then looked back at you. “My horse?” 

“Don’t even start.” You rolled your eyes then tried to dismount Arthur’s horse on your own. “Oh, someone’s gonna help me, right?”

“Yeah, come here, rabbit…” Jaime put down his gun and helped you get down, holding you till you sat on the porch’s stairs. Arthur joined you on the ground, patting his horse and watching your brother taking care of you.

“You will explain to me what happened later.” He said to you, then turned to Arthur. “I’m sorry for the gun. You can never be too careful. Want something to drink? It’s fucking hot outside…”

Arthur looked at you as he wanted your permission to stay. You smiled and nodded approvingly, assuring him you were okay with him staying here with you. 

“Y/N!” A little girl was running into your direction. “Y/N, you’re back!”

“Ellie…” You said when reached you, hugging into you tightly. “Yeah, I am. Ouch, be careful…”

“Are you hurt?” She looked around herself and noticed Arthur. “Who are you? Are you my sister’s friend?”

“Ellie…” You hissed, feeling embarrassed because of her. You loved your little sister, but she knew no boundaries. You brushed her brown hair teasingly and she grimaced and pulled away from you. “Why don’t you go and find dad?”

“So what do you say, Arthur?” Jaime asked again after she lost Ellie from his sight. “Whiskey or beer?”

“You won’t take no as an answer, huh?” 

“Not really. Not after you brought my sister back home safely.” He smiled at him brightly. “Come on, man. Are you in a hurry or something?”

Arthur huffed, rubbing back of his neck. He looked down as he was looking for an excuse, but after a brief moment, he replied. “No. Whiskey sounds good.”


	2. A job offer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's take a closer look at the Blackburn family... ;)

You three sat on the porch, at the wooden table, which was covered with a cream coloured tablecloth. Jaime disappeared inside and a few moments later he was back with a beer and a glass of whiskey for Arthur. He placed it right in front of him then took a seat. You observed them from the other end of the table, gently rubbing your swollen ankle.

“So, Arthur, tell me where were you heading before my lovely sister stopped you?” Jaime asked and took a sip of beer from the bottle.

“Believe me or not…” He replied, snapping the glass with his fingers. “I was just heading West.”

“Curiosity killed the cat, Jaime.” You had interrupted him before he asked Arthur another question.

“Oh, I see your ankle doesn’t hurt as much as it did.” He smiled sourly and raised his left brown. “You’re stingy.”

“And you’re nosy.” You fired back automatically.

“It’s fine, Y/N. Your brother can ask me whatever he wants.” Arthur took a sip of his whiskey. “I’m really thankful for your hospitality. It’s a nice change to stop travelling for a while.”

Arthur caught you staring at him as he raised his sight from the glass that he was holding in his hands. You blushed and looked down immediately, hoping he wouldn’t think bad of you. You didn’t have time to look closer at him earlier - at first, you didn’t notice he was wearing a blue, striped shirt, chestnut brown pants and a little bit darker cowboy boots. He put away his hat, the strands of his light brown hair fell on his forehead. It looked as if it was a while since he cut them, but he still looked good - a little bit longer than short hair matched his at least two weeks old stubble.

“It must be tiring to be travelling all the time… Not knowing an exact destination.” You said shyly, trying to look at him again and hoping your red cheeks wouldn’t be as noticeable as a moment ago.

“It is, but I got used to it already.” He said shortly and smirked. _Yeah, they were still visible._

“You could take a break from travelling here.” A low voice came from behind Arthur’s back. A tall, old man suddenly appeared on the porch, holding a little girl in his arm. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop. I’m Thomas Blackburn, the father of these three.” 

“Arthur. Arthur Morgan.” He wanted to stand up, but Thomas stopped him by the gesture of his hand.

“Don’t get up, son.” Thomas smiled widely at him and sat down on the chair that was standing next to the stairs. “Ellie told me you’re Y/N’s friend, is that right?” 

You looked at your sister and shook your head while she smiled innocently, trying to ease your displeasure. Arthur rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably, this question must’ve surprised him. “I’m rather a stranger who helped her in a need.”

“Is that so?” The old man asked but soon noticed your swollen ankle. “Dear God… Thank you, good man. Y/N… you will explain yourself later.”

“I will, dad.” You confirmed.

“Anyway, perhaps it’s a coincidence but I’m currently looking for a spare pair of hands to work here.” Thomas turned back to Arthur. “And from what I heard already you’re looking for some time away from travelling. So tell me, would you like to gain some money?”

“I’m not a rancher, sir. That’s a tempting offer, but I don’t think I’m the person you’re looking for.” Arthur replied after a moment.

“Nonsense. I’m not looking for a rancher but a man who has the strength to work. You look like you’ve got plenty of it.” The man laughed and looked at his son. “Jaime, bring your old father a beer. Arthur, it’s a fair offer and as a thank you for saving my daughter, I am willing to pay you more than usual. So what do you say on that?”

“I think in that case I could give it a try. I already told your son I’m not in a hurry. Besides, money could be useful to me.”

“Good. Then I’m gonna let Jaime show you around tomorrow.” Thomas said just when his son came back with a beer for him. He looked at him gratefully as Jaime placed the bottle on the ground next to him. “He’s my right hand here, on this ranch. Get up, Ellie, let your daddy get a drink.”

The girl obediently followed his request and in a moment she was back on her feet. “Can I go play in the stable now?”

“Alright, but be careful. Understood?” She nodded cheerfully and ran there straight away. “Oh, Ellie, Ellie… Hope you don’t mind me asking, Arthur, but do you have children?”

“I don’t, sir.”

“Oh, stop calling me sir. I’m Thomas.” A man took a sip from the bottle and sighed heavily. “That’s a shame. A big one. If it wasn’t for my children I would probably be a greedy old man. But look at me - I might be old but for sure, I’m not greedy. I have these three to keep me in a shape and…” 

“And busy?” Arthur finished his whiskey and put the glass back on the table.

“And busy.” Thomas agreed, laughing under his breath. “Jaime, be this kind and take your sister upstairs. I need to speak with Arthur privately.”

“Come on, lubber,” Jaime said as he helped you stand up. “Let’s do something with your ankle.”

You had looked at Arthur once more before you and your brother disappeared inside the house. He carried you upstairs to your room and as he laid you down on your bed, he said:

“I saw it.”

“Saw what?” You looked at him questioningly.

“The way you were looking at him. You already like this guy, don’t you?” He sat at the edge of your bed. “Oh please, I know you. I’ve never seen you looking at someone like that.”

“Mind your own business, okay?”

“I won’t tell dad, easy.” Jaime winked at you and laughed as he saw an embarrassment on your face. “Got you there, sister. I’m gonna get some bandages and we will do something with that ankle, alright? You will have some time to tell me what is so fascinating about him that you were sitting red as a beetroot down there.”

“You’re awful.” You said shortly, turning your face from him. “And I won’t tell you a thing, because there’s nothing to talk about.”

“You can lie to yourself, but for me… you’re a terrible liar.” He said and left the room, leaving you alone.

_He couldn’t really see that… or could he? Damn._

~~~

The following week passed quickly. Turned out Arthur was better rancher than he claimed to be, learning fast and doing well all the tasks Jaime gave him. He spent most of the time in the stable and all the horses you had seemed to love him. His help was also really precious for your dad could finally spend more time with his youngest daughter. Before Arthur appeared you had seen he missed that opportunity a lot.

To be honest, you also were pleased with having Arthur around. Maybe even too pleased. You didn’t want to admit that your brother was right, but there was a possibility you might’ve liked Arthur a little bit more than you should. But as long as no one except Jaime knew about that - it was easy to hide.

Soon you could walk again so you went back to everyday chores, which meant seeing Arthur more often. How surprised you were when you saw him one morning, sitting on the porch’s stairs and playing with Ellie. She laughed so loud as he placed her on his knees and started to move them up and down, making her bounce with the moves of his knees. You had been staring at them for a moment, enjoying this view before you approached them slowly.

“Seems like you both are having fun.” You pointed out, biting your bottom lip as Arthur looked up at you.

“Y/N! Arthur is so cool! He was playing hide and seek with me earlier!” The girl said with her high-pitched voice.

“That sounds really nice, Ellie.” You said as she got off from Arthur’s lap. Her blonde hair fell on her face, covering her eyes. “Come here, I need to redo your ponytail…”

“I’m nine! I can do my own ponytail.” She declared and ran away before you could catch her.

“What a child…” You sighed and shook your head. “You seem to have experience with children even though you claimed not to have any of your own.”

“Yeah… My friend has a son and he basically grew up with me next to him. Learned a thing or two.” Arthur moved so you could sit next to him. “How’s your ankle?”

“Good. It almost doesn’t hurt me anymore.”

“I’m glad to hear that, Y/N. I heard you run the stable and I wonder whether you want to go for a ride with me one day? You’ve got beautiful horses there.”

“Yeah, I’d like to.” You tried to keep your cool, not showing him that his offer made your heart beat a little bit faster. “They’re not exactly mine… Some of them are Jaime’s.”

“Well, still they’re amazing.” 

“Thank you.” You smiled at him and tucked a piece of hair behind your left ear. “Listen, I wanted to thank…”

You didn’t manage to finish a sentence as the house door opened rapidly and Jaime appeared in the entrance, holding a bucket and a fishing rod in his hand. He brushed back his brown hair as he passed by then stopped in front of you.

“I was looking for you, Arthur. Would you like to go fishing with me? I could use your help, dad said you’re a good fisherman.” He said firmly and handed Arthur the bucket. 

“Sure.” Arthur put on his hat then looked at you. “Can your sister go with us?”

“Actually…” Jaime seemed surprised. “Someone has to look after Ellie. Sorry, Y/N.”

“It’s fine.” You smiled sourly when Arthur patted your arm. “Besides I think I need some more rest before I could walk more than a few meters again.”

“Then I guess I will see you later, Y/N.” He stood up and joined Jaime on their way to the horses. “Duty calls.”

“Duty calls…” You murmured under your breath, irritated that Jaime interrupted you before you could thank Arthur for help. You stamped your foot angrily and watched them leave. It was frustrating for you, but you didn’t want them to see that. _Goddamn you, Jaime_. You thought, getting up from the stairs and watching them disappearing from the horizon. _I’m not your little sister anymore and your days of protecting me are over._


	3. Not so little anymore

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let’s speed it up a little 😉 + I’m sorry for such a long break!

There was a thing about your brother - he has always been overprotective. But it really started when your mother passed away a few years ago and your father spent most of his days drinking himself almost to death. These times were not easy for neither of you. Four years later, not many things have changed - Jaime took many responsibilities from your father, it was no wonder why he sometimes acted just like him. What was worse, even though you were not so little anymore, he somehow could not stop being overprotective of you. You and Ellie have always been his little sisters and he could not start thinking otherwise.

But you could. 

It did take some time to escape Jaime’s protective cage. It was not easy - he was watching you carefully and prevent you from any kind of contact with Arthur. You were smarter though and used every opportunity to sneak out with him - you started strolling around the ranch together, going on horse rides and sometimes when you were not watching your little sister, you liked to help him with work he had to do. You were mostly watching and smiling at him, but he did not mind. He liked when you did so.

So it was not a surprise that at one point it just happened. You and Arthur. One warm, starry night, both of you naked in the barn, having the best sex in your life.

“Oh god, Arthur…” You moaned as he sped up his pace at the same time burying his face into your neck. Your hands instinctively wandered to his back, your nails started to leave marks as you dig them into his skin. All you could think of was how good it felt to be with him.

“Hmm?” He groaned then bit the skin on your neck teasingly. 

“N-nothing… Just don’t stop.” You only managed to say, feeling the growing pleasure with every move he made. You have been with someone before but Arthur… He had no competition.

So when he lifted his face to look at you, your lips unconsciously wanted to meet his in a kiss, but he moved away, slowing down his moves.

“No kissing on the lips, remember? It’s just sex. No feelings attached, pretty.” He said, speeding up again.

 _Ouch_. His words hurt. Even though you knew it from the start, because you had made it clear before it happened, it still hurt. Maybe you were trying to fool yourself thinking it might change, but a piece of you really wanted to believe so. _For you, it was not just sex._ You wanted more, but Arthur could not give you that back then. Nevertheless, you gave him exactly what he wanted - a moment of pleasure with no strings attached.

_God, why did he have to be this handsome?_

For a second you thought that you should have listened to your brother. You should not have paid attention to a man like Arthur and especially, you should not have had sex with him in the barn at the first possible occasion.

_How foolish of you._

But deep inside you knew that this has been what you both secretly wanted since the day he rescued you. Even Jaime could not keep you apart even though he really wanted to, thinking of many things to keep Arthur busy and away from you. If someone did not know about your deal - that person could have thought you were each other’s meant to be.

But there were no feelings attached. You must remember that.

“Fuck.” He groaned and the wave of pleasure came through your whole body. Seconds later he pulled out, spilling his seed on the hay.

Arthur breathed heavily as he laid down on his back right next to you. You turned your head towards him, biting your bottom lip.

I _t was just sex, Y/N, get over it._

“It was… You were… great.” You breathed out eventually. “I… really liked that.”

“I’m glad.” He responded, turning to the side. For a second your eyes met, giving you hope he would kiss you eventually, but he did not. “I should probably get going. Don’t want your brother or father to catch us red-handed.”

“Yeah, I don’t want that either.” You agreed and started looking for your clothes. You put on your shirt and started buttoning it while Arthur managed to get almost fully clothed. “Woah, you really don’t want them to catch us.”

“What can I say, I really like working for your father.” He shrugged and fastened his belt. “Besides, I respect him as much as I respect your brother.”

“Since when respecting the host includes fucking his daughter in the barn?” You smiled, even though you knew he would not see that in the darkness.

“Yeah, I just don’t need trouble, you know? I guess you don’t need them too.”

“I get it. So… what’s next?” You could not stop yourself from asking this haunting question. “With… you and me?”

He had thought for a moment before he replied. “I guess I will see you around. Take care of yourself in the meantime.”

And with his final words, he left. _What the hell? He dared to leave you like that?_ Maybe, you should have really listened to your brother. Arthur was no different than the other men, you used to know before him. _So why this time it hurt a little bit more than before?_ Why this time you desperately wanted him to come back to you? Because this time, there was supposed to be no feelings.

_But you had too many of them for him._

_But you could not tell him about that.  
_

~~~

Maybe it was all going too fast for both of you, you just could not admit it or you did not want to admit it. _Actually, what did you expect?_ You have known him for a month, maybe a month and a half. No one with common sense would fall far someone in that short time. _So why did you always blush when Arthur was around? Or could not stop thinking of him when he was not around?_

“Mind explaining to me what’s going on with you and Arthur?” Jaime’s voice dragged you out of your thoughts. You were washing dishes and the glass you were holding slipped out of your hands, crashing into pieces as it hit the ground.

“Damn.” You hissed and crouched to pick what was left of the glass from the ground. “Nothing, Jaime.”

“Is that so? Lately, you both have been… Little absent, don’t you think?” He leaned against the kitchen’s wall. “I just… I’m worried about you, Y/N. You know you can talk to me about anything?”

“Oh, stop it, Jaime.” You said in a bitter tone. “I’m not your little sister anymore, so please, stop treating me like one. Fuck!!”

The blood spilt on your left hand as the piece of the glass cut your skin deeply. It was not pleasuring to watch, not to mention it hurt like hell, even though it was not the biggest cut you had in your life. It has been worse many times before. You let that piece fall to the ground and you covered the wound with the other hand, trying to stop the bleeding.

“Let me-” Jaime said, but then Arthur appeared out of nowhere and interrupted him before he could offer you his help.

“Move.” He pushed Jaime away and stood next to you.

“What… I got this, it’s just a cut.” You assured him as he gently grabbed your hand. “Wh-what are you doing here? I thought you were working behind the barn today.”

“It was a one, loud _fuck_ , Y/N. I’ve never heard you scream so loud, so I needed to check if you were alright.” He replied and pulled a piece of material out of his pocket then tied the palm of your hand with it. “You were lucky there was no glass in your wound.”

“I know. Could’ve been much worse then.” 

“Em, Arthur?” Jaime grunted from behind. “My father ain’t paying you for talking to my sister.”

If your eyes could kill, they would definitely kill your brother at that moment. You looked at him and shook your head slowly in a gesture of disapproval and disgust. “Watch your mouth, Jaime.” 

“He’s right.” Arthur winked at you and moved away, letting go of your hand. “I wanted to help, but I’m gonna go back to work now. Just… Let me know if you need anything.” 

You nodded approvingly and watched him go outside through the kitchen doors. You turned around to see your brother’s grumpy face and said:

“What was that?”

“What?”

“One moment you’re friends with Arthur and now you tell him that our father doesn’t pay him for talking to me? He was helping me, for god’s sake.” You rolled back your eyes. “I’m done here, Jaime.” 

“Oh, no, no, you’re not going anywhere.” Before you passed him through he had grabbed your forearm. “I don’t like seeing him near you. It’s just… He seems odd after all, you know? Like he’s hiding something or…”

“Seriously, what’s your problem? Back off, before I tell dad what you are doing to me and to the man who saved my life. Twice.” You freed your forearm from his grasp and walked out of the room, not waiting for his response.

You could hear him snarl under his breath as you left the kitchen and started walking upstairs, straight to your room. You were… Angry. And disappointed. Why could not Jaimie understand you did not need his protection anymore? You entered your room and laid down on the bed. Your thoughts immediately went to Arthur - you could not quite understand him - after the night in the barn he seemed distant, but today… _What was that? Should not he suppose not to care? Was not that the part of the deal?_

In the end, your brother was right about one thing - Arthur was a mystery man, indeed.


	4. Our mistakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is longer than I expected. Well, well-deserved after such a long waiting, but I finally feel like writing - again. :)

„It’s four o'clock in the morning, what are you doing?” A hoarse voice asked behind your back. You were sitting on the stairs, staring blankly at the yard in front of your house. The sun was rising slowly, reminding you of the beginning of a new day and at the same time that you did not sleep a bit that night. You were exhausted but could not force yourself to sleep. There were masses of thoughts floating around your mind and you could only wish you could turn your brain off - but that was not possible. “And for god’s sake, what did happen to your hand? What’s that bandage for?”

“I cut it with a piece of glass, but it’s not a big deal, dad.” You answered quietly as you were afraid your voice could wake the rest of your family. “I couldn’t sleep at night as I was wondering…”

“About what, dear?”

“What… What do you think of Arthur?”

“What do I think of him? He seems to be a good and hardworking man.” He replied, taking a seat next to you. “I was sceptical about him at first, that’s true, but he proved his worth to me. Not mentioning he helped you on that road back then… And these sounds from the barn, Y/N… I can only imagine how much you like this guy, but wasting a night to think about him…”

“Dad!” You turned red immediately, your eyes widened in shock. “I, we didn’t —Did Jaime tell you?“

“No he didn’t, but I’m not blind or deaf either. You’re a grown-up woman, Y/N. You decide who you want to be with. As long as he makes you happy, I ain’t gonna say anything.” He put an arm around you comfortingly and left a small kiss on your forehead. “As a father, the only thing I want for my daughters is to find men who will make you happy and will take care of you when one day I’ll be gone.”

“There’s plenty of time left before that will happen, dad.” You rested your head on your dad’s shoulder. “But don’t you think… there’s something mysterious about Arthur? I mean… He showed up out of nowhere, in the middle of nowhere. I realised there are so many things I don’t know about him.”

“Jaime made you doubt him, didn’t he?” The man sighed. “He told me about his doubts too, but honestly, I don’t really know if there’s anything serious to worry about. Maybe you should talk to Arthur and get to know him better instead of trusting your brother blindly? Since your mother passed away he… He has changed. He’s not the boy I used to know anymore.”

“You’re right, dad. He has changed but he has always wanted to protect me and…”

“I understand, but don’t let him blind you and take away someone who matters something to you. He’s your brother and I guess he might be a little bit jealous of you. Give him some time to adjust to this new situation.” Thomas smiled at you gently.

“Oh, I don’t know…”

“Hey, what’s wrong? What does that sad face mean?”

“I… The worst is that I’m just not sure if Arthur feels something to me. ”

Thomas closed his eyes and thought for a moment before he said: “I was once young too, Y/N. I did stupid things, some I regret and some that I’m really thankful for. But if there’s one thing I learned for sure is that you can’t do **_that_** with someone you have absolutely no feelings for. It’s not working like that. You can’t feel nothing doing something so intimate…”

“Dad…” You stopped him before he could get into more details. “I get it. Really. I’m… just scared it won’t work out.”

“But you will never know if you won’t try. Oh come on, does your old man really have to tell you things like that?”

“I will try.” You agreed and shook your head as you couldn’t quite believe you really said that and that it was your father you made you say so. “I would have never thought you will be the one who will say things like these to me.”

“And I would have never thought the opinion of your brother would make such a big difference to you. You don’t have to listen to him anymore. At least not in that case.” He had patted your arm before he got up back on his feet. “Now go and get some sleep. You need it.”

“Dad?” You had asked before he walked away. “Can you not tell Arthur or Jaime… You know?”

“I won’t tell anything, I ain’t stupid, love.” He assured you. “But now really go and get some sleep, before I will change my mind.”

You nodded and listened to your father. So with a feeling of huge relief, you instantly got up and quietly walked upstairs to your bedroom, falling asleep like a baby right after you found yourself in your bed.

***

“Ah Princess, you’re finally awake,” Jaime said irritated after you went down to the kitchen in the late morning. He was sitting on the chair with his legs laid down on the table, cleaning his cattleman. “I thought you will never wake up.”

“Good morning to you.” You replied, ignoring his tone. “I didn’t sleep well tonight, sorry.”

“Did Arthur keep you up?” He blurted and you felt like something started to boil inside you. He stood up still holding a gun in his hand and said: “I swear if I see him touching you, I…”

“You what?” You approached him and stood right in front of his face, saying slowly and clearly every word so he would understand the message. “What will you do? You ain’t my father to make threats like this one to me, so back off and take care of your business instead of mine.”

Jaime swallowed loudly and put the gun away on the table, clenching his fists right after he did so. “Careful there, little sister.”

“I told you I’m not your little sister anymore.” You hissed. “What’s wrong with you? What did you do to my brother, huh? Because you’re not acting like him anymore too.”

“What?” He asked surprised. “What do you mean by telling me I’m not acting like me anymore?”

“You’re toxic, Jaime. That’s what you wanted to hear? You can’t keep telling me you’re doing all these crazy things and acting like an idiot because you care about me, because it’s just an excuse for your toxicity.”

“Ah, there you are kids.” Your father had entered in before Jaime could say something in his defence. “Is everything alright between you?”

There was a moment of silence broke the by the embittered voice of your brother. “I don’t think so, dad.”

“What happened?” Asked your father, but Jaime already left, shutting the door behind his back. You shivered at the sound of the wooden doors hitting the casing. “Actually, I don’t want to know. Show me your hand, Y/N, we need to change the bandage.”

You sat down by the table with him and let your dad take a look of your cut wound. It hurt a little when he got rid of the last layer, ripping the dried blood from your wound. It was still open as the blood started to flow out of it slowly. You shut your eyes and turned your head away so you would not have to look at it completely. 

Suddenly, there was a double knock on the doors and Arthur entered in, stopping right after the threshold. “Good morning, mister Blackburn. Y/N.” 

“G’ morning, Arthur,” Thomas replied and stood up to welcome him. “How are you this morning? Is everything fine?” 

“I’m alright. Everything is perfectly fine, I just wanted to check on your daughter.” 

“Is that so?” 

“I was nearby when she cut her hand and I wanted to make sure she’s okay,” Arthur explained and approached you, leaning over your hand. “Ouch, it doesn’t look great.”

“It doesn’t feel great either.” You added, still keeping your eyes closed.

“May I?” He asked your father and he agreed, letting him sit on the chair next to you. “I brought some alcohol to clean the wound and a fresh bandage… It’s gonna hurt, Y/N, but it will make the healing faster.”

Without a proper warning, he spilt some of the alcohol on your hand and you did not have to wait long for it to start hurt like hell. You bit your bottom lip to stop yourself from cursing his name in front of your father. After a minute or two, the pain weakened and you opened your eyes, forcing yourself to look at the pinching cut. 

“It’s okay, you were really brave,” Arthur smirked as he started to put a new bandage around your hand. “I really hope we won’t have to do this again, though.” 

“Me too.” You said, breathing deeply and trying to calm yourself down. The view of blood has never been your favourite, especially if it was your blood. 

“Okay, now that I know the situation is under control I will leave you two here.” Your father spoke and you realised he still was there, behind your back, watching every of Arthur’s moves. “Besides, Y/N, are you still going on James’ birthday tonight in Blackwater?”

“In Blackwater?” You realised you completely forgot about it. “I think, I will be there.”

“Good. I will be there too, I haven’t seen James’ father, Bill, for months.”

“Who’s James?” Arthur asked confused and immediately you wished he had not done that. 

“He’s my best friend’s son and the best friend of my son. We’re like a family, I guess.” Thomas explained. “You’re also welcomed there, Arthur.”

“Thank you.” 

“Speaking of family…” Your father added. “Will you drop Ellie to miss Wesley? I spoke to her a few days ago and she told me she would love to watch Ellie while we’re in Blackwater.”  

“Sure, no problem.” You replied kindly and looked at Arthur who has just finished putting a bandage on your hand. 

“Good. Thank you, Y/N. So I guess I see you both tonight?” Thomas asked right before he had left. 

“Sure,” Arthur answered on behalf of you two, making your father smirk.

When he has left the room and you were alone, a moment of awkward silence had to pass before Arthur spoke again. “You have to tell me about this James.”

“There’s nothing to talk about, Arthur.” You blurted out. “My father said it all.” 

“Oh, is that so?” He looked at you suspiciously. “You blushed when your father mentioned his name.”

_Shoot._

“I blushed because my hand hurt, not because my dad mentioned his name.” You made an excuse, but deep inside you knew it was not true. You just hoped Arthur would not notice that little lie. 

“Ah, okay. Suit yourself.” He shrugged, leaving you unable to tell if he discovered your lie or not. “So when are we leaving?” 

“Maybe at five?” You suggested. 

“Sounds good.” Arthur smiled and stood up, heading to the doors right after. “See you then, pretty.”

***

Thank god your father had more than three horses cause you could have sworn that if you were forced to ride with Arthur, Jaime or even your dad - it would have been torture. You wanted to avoid awkward questions from Arthur - as you still had no idea at what point you two were, an argument with Jaime and a parent talk from your old pa. So after you left Ellie at miss Wesley’s place you had some time alone with your thoughts again. You started wondering if lying to Arthur about James was a good idea, but on the other hand, there was no rational reason why you should have told him about your past with James - these were old times when you both were young and foolish, thinking you could be together. But it was a long time ago. Since that time you have remained friends, considering the close relation your fathers had. But you were nothing more than friends and you both knew that. Then why did you find it odd to tell Arthur about it? 

There were two options: one was that you were scared he would feel uncomfortable with the thought there was someone out there who mattered something for you in the past. The second was that you did not know much about Arthur so there was a part of you that was telling you that you should wait until you get to know each other better. You did not want to overwhelm him with your history as he was still a mystery for you.

“You there?” Arthur asked as you stopped in front of a saloon in Blackwater. The sun was already setting down slowly, leaving the town in purple-orange colours. 

You had dismounted your horse and tied it to the post before you replied: “Yeah, I’m here.”

“You looked like you were lost in your thoughts for a minute.” Arthur pointed, but you did not take it personally. 

“Maybe for a minute I was, indeed.” You corrected your white shirt and smoothened your blue skirt and winked at him. “Have you seen my father and brother around?” 

“I haven’t.” He said and joined you on the way to the saloon. “I guess they’re already inside.”

“Oh, I really hope so.” You gasped.

As you entered inside the building there were already many people, most of them you did not know at all. You were searching for similar faces in the crowd till you found James - right next to the bar, the place he belonged to. He smiled at you as soon as he noticed you and approached you with a bottle of whiskey in his hand. Despite running time, he has not changed much - he was still tall, well-built man with thick, black hair and big matching eyes. 

“Y/N! What a surprise.” He shouted so you could hear him in the buzz made by other people talking and singing around you. “I’m glad you came.”

“Happy birthday, James.” You hugged him in a friendly gesture. He smiled at you, showing his impeccably white teeth. “Thank you so much for inviting us all. Are my dad and Jaime here already?” 

“Yeah, there are with my dad upstairs.” James looked at Arthur who was standing beside you. “And you… You must be Arthur. Thomas told us about you. The rescuer of our sweet Y/N.” 

“I just gave her a hand when she needed one,” Arthur explained and shook James’ hand. “Happy birthday, buddy.”

“Thanks. I will catch you later for a round or two.” He said to Arthur. “In the meantime, please, enjoy yourselves.”

You must have taken _enjoy yourself_ too personally as after an hour or so you were drunk, drinking whiskey glass after glass. There was not much left of control you had in yourself so you just let the alcohol took control over you. Maybe it was not the wisest solution, but for a moment it let you cut yourself off from all the problems you had - and for the first time in a while you had fun. _Well, maybe even too much fun._

“So you said you were travelling with the gang before?” 

“I did, but it was not just a gang… They were my family.” Arthur replied, putting away the glass. “See, life was not always this kind to me. Things were different before.” 

“Do you miss them… Sometimes?” You asked leaning over Arthur so you could hear him better. You did not mind being close to him too. “It must be really hard for you, I’m sorry…”

“It’s better this way. Even though sometimes… Yeah, I miss them.” He confessed as the barman put another whiskey in front of him and you. “Things started to get worse and I guess we all were sick of it. Anyway, we’re surely better separately than together, after everything that happened.”

“Will you tell me more about ‘em?” 

“Not today, pretty.” He said and took a shot of his whiskey. He put down the glass and then your eyes met in a gaze - everything that was around you suddenly stopped existing for you. It was like the whole world stopped for a moment when you were looking at each other with so much desire, you could feel the tension in the air around you. You simultaneously started leaning closer and closer to him, your lips desperately wanted to meet his in a kiss and then…

“Y/N, don’t.” Apparently, he was sober enough to know it would be a big mistake to kiss you there and also if he let you kiss him it would mean he broke his own rule. No kissing on the lips. “You’re drunk. I’m drunk. You would regret that in the morning.” 

“Yeah, you’re right.” You mumbled and stood up, staggering as you made the first step. “It’s okay, I just need to get some air.”

“I’ll go with you…”

“No. I’m good.” You insisted and walked outside, trying not to collapse. You managed to reach the stairs as you leaned against the wooden beam. You felt sorry for yourself for a moment as the tears streamed down your face - why were you even crying? What were you thinking to yourself - that as soon as Arthur would open to you about his past he would also change his mind about you? Oh, you were such a fool. You were hoping for too much, why were you even disappointed with such result? 

“Y/N? Hey, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” James asked, appearing behind your back. 

“It’s no-nothing.” You stammered, wiping away the tears. “I just… I’m sad, James. And confused.”

“Is this because of him?” 

“No… Yes.” You nodded, trying to hold back tears. You really did not want to cry in front of James. You did not want to ruin his birthday and all. “It’s complicated.” 

“As we weren’t, Y/N. Back then.” James said, grabbing your hand. “Sometimes I think of us… But there is no going back. Anyways, I can’t watch you being sad because of some jerk. Come on, can I have this dance?” 

“But they’re not playing anything to dance for.” You pointed, but he already pulled you with him back inside the saloon. 

“Gentlemen, please, play us something to dance.” James turned to two of the men who were sitting next to the piano. 

They started to play a rhythmical melody right away and at this point, you knew you had no other option, but to dance with James. You let him spin you around and lift you up from time to time as you danced. You were so focused on not bumping into him or stepping on his feet, you almost forgot you had an audience - suddenly all of the people who were in the saloon were focused on you, watching you dance before some of the other pairs joined you on the dance floor.

As the music stopped playing, James grabbed and kissed your hand gently, bowing in front of you and at the same time, thanking for this dance.

“That’s what I wanted to see - this smile is one of a kind!” James said as you smiled at him. “My mission is completed, you smiled and I hope you’re feeling better.”

“A little.” You admitted.

“Don’t turn around,” James said unexpectedly, but you did not listen. You wished you had as when you turned around and saw another girl in Arthur’s embrace. You did not have much time to look closer at her as Jaime dragged you out of the crowd, out of the saloon and you were back outside in a second. 

“Y/N… Hey, hey, it’s alright.”

You sobbed loudly, sitting down on the stairs and hiding your head between your knees, leaving the wet stamps of tears on your skirt.

“It’s not, James.” You wept. “It hurts so much. I want to go home.”

“Y/N!” Arthur went outside, calling out your name. When he noticed you, he immediately approached you, but you stood up and moved away from him. “Hey, it’s not what it looked like. I didn’t mean…”

“Get out of my sight, Arthur!” You cried out. “I can’t talk to you right now. I don’t want to talk to you cause I’m afraid I might say or do something I really would regret in the morning!”

“Please, let me explain…” He said, but James interrupted him.

“There’s nothing to explain, buddy,” James told him. “Just… Don’t do it right now.”

Arthur’s fists clenched and he was about to hit James when someone grabbed his hand, preventing him from making another mistake that night.

“Arthur, friend, back off.” It was your father. He was standing in front of him, trying to calm him down. “It’s not a good moment for explanations.”

“Y/N… I’m sorry…” Arthur kept trying, this time calmer. “I will explain…”

“Spare it.” You told him and turned to your father. “Dad, take me home.” 

And without asking additional questions, he did what you asked him for.


	5. Bruised not broken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some good old making up, right before everything will go down again. Spoilers, yay.

The memories of that awful night could not leave you. They were constantly replaying in your mind, making you feel even worse than you already did. It was a weird feeling - you felt betrayed, but the longer you thought about it the more you were unsure whether you had the right to feel that way. As a result, you were trying to avoid Arthur at all cost - you were not ready to talk to him nor listen to his explanations.  

_But you were not together. Not even close to that.  
_

_So why did it feel like he cheated on you in a way?_

Despite your best efforts to avoid him, Arthur tried to talk to you multiple times since that night, but every time it was you who cut him off. You were so mad at him and at yourself at the same time - maybe you should have never let him so close to you in the first place. _Maybe your brother was right and Arthur was nothing but trouble?_

Ironically, the more time you spent without Arthur around the more you wanted to talk to him. In the end, a decent explanation would make you feel a lot better, you thought. Moreover, it would clean the atmosphere in your house, because, to be honest, it was pretty awkward. Your brother practically did not speak to Arthur and your father was torn between you as his daughter and Arthur as his employee and friend. The only neutral person was Ellie - actually, no one was surprised, she was too little to understand the situation - and she was the only one talking to him and making him read her stories after he finished his work for the day.

_It’s been four days of silence. Four days without a word spoken to Arthur.  
_

_It was started getting harder than you had thought it would be._

“Y/N?” Arthur decided to try to talk to you again as he noticed you in the morning, working in the garden behind the house. “Your father told me you would be here… Can we talk?”

“About what?” You asked without looking at him and at the same time pulled up some weeds. “Wait, did you talk to my father about me?”

“You know about what. You’ve been avoiding me for days and… It was Thomas who insisted we should eventually talk to each other.” He paused. “I want to explain this all to you. I know, you’ve heard versions from your brother and James, but… It would be nice if you listened to me as well.”

“Alright, I’m listening.” You got up and turned towards him. “Your explanation must be a good one if my dad heard it and still told you to go with it to me.”

He leaned his elbows against the white, wooden fence and grunted, clearing his throat. “First of all, I don’t even know that girl, Y/N. It’s insane, but you have to trust me with it. She approached me right after you left. I tried to tell her off, but she kept talking to me and I don’t even know how she ended up in my arms, she must’ve stumbled or something… But nothing happened between us. Nothing.”

“Yeah… You realize it doesn’t make much sense, right? Or is it common for you to end up with random girls in your embrace?” You questioned him.

“Oh god…” He gasped. “It’s just… James made it a bigger deal than it really was, that’s where the problem is. He should’ve stayed away from this. From you.”

“No, Arthur, he didn’t make a bigger deal out of this. You did. James knew we came to his birthday party together and wanted to cheer me up after you basically left me hanging, because, hey, no feelings attached!” You grabbed the rake that was leaned against the fence and started plundering angrily. Your moves were rapid as you were trying to release your negative emotions and save yourself from saying too much to Arthur. _Pointlessly_. “I felt like a goddamn idiot, Arthur! I spent half of the night with you, talking and all, so I started thinking that maybe, just maybe, we were eventually going in the right direction, getting close to each other, but as usual, I was wrong!”

“Oh, do you really think James did that just because he wanted to cheer you up?” He asked in a bitter tone. “Didn’t you see how he looked at you?”

“How did he look at me exactly?”

“Like he wanted you.”

“Listen… Even if he did look at me this way… What’s the problem?” You looked at him, breathing heavily as you got tired of raking. “We were together once, but it’s past. We don’t have much more in common than a short and irrelevant history.”

Arthur huffed and looked down, shaking his head as he was disappointed with your response. For a moment, you felt guilty that you confessed to him that you and James were together. _Once. A long time ago. And if you could, you would love to erase that time from your life, but unfortunately, there was no such option._

“A history is something that bonds people, don’t you think?” He asked, still not looking at you.

“Not in that case.” You replied, putting away the rake and brushing strands of hair out of your face.

“So, if he told you that he wants you back…”

“As I said, James and I are done.” You sighed. “I would never go back to him.”

“Why?” Arthur blurted.

“Because we didn’t work out and I don’t want to make the same mistake twice. Besides… To be honest, I met someone new. Someone I really care about and I wouldn’t want to fuck this up.”

“Y/N… I’m so sorry…” He raised his sight, realising you were referring to him. “I swear I didn’t know who that girl was… I would have never hurt you on purpose.”

“Yeah… I guess it doesn’t matter now, does it? You hurt me already and you said you don’t want anything more than… What we had. So why do you even bother? Want my forgiveness? Here it is. I forgive you. You’re free to go now.”  

“I never said… Y/N.” You were about to pass him by when he grabbed your arm and stopped you from walking away from him. “It was never just about sex. I-I just… When I saw you in his arms I realised it was never just about it. I don’t want it to be just about it.”

“You don’t?” You were surprised by his confession.

“I really don’t. I… I was alone for a long time so I kinda got used to that. Got used to not being attached to someone. It was easier, better and saved me from hurting.” Arthur pondered. “I don’t want to live like that anymore. At first, I didn’t believe I would stay here, with you, more than a few days. I was on the run for such a long time, it felt so weird to have the same place to sleep every night. But it’s real and I really started to wonder… Can I leave my past behind me for good?”

“Arthur…”

“And till that night I didn’t quite believe that, but you made me change my mind.”

“Then why didn’t you let me kiss you?” You asked him the most bothering question you had. “Supposing, all you’re telling me is true…”

“I… I didn’t want our first kiss to look like this. I was drunk, you were drunk and… I wish we could have a second chance and start our relation differently. Properly this time, not rushing things or starting with having sex…”

“Sounds good to me.” You said to him, pointing your finger at his arm and digging it into his skin. “But, just so you know, I’m still mad at you.”

“Got it.” He agreed, backing off with his hands raised up. “I’m gonna go now… So I wouldn’t risk you getting more mad at me… Want to see me later, beautiful?”

“You’re silly.” You chuckled. “Put your hands down, cowboy.”

It was a brief moment of happiness mixed with relief. It was a time when you believed you two were going in the right direction, just strayed off the road for a while. You did not want to remember bad things and really wanted to start again with him as past few days were torture for you. You were so weak for this man, there was nothing you could do to stop yourself from falling for him.

“Seriously, Arthur? What the hell do you want from my sister?” You did not realize Jaime was standing right behind the corner of your house until he spoke unexpectedly, scaring you out. “You’re brave enough to talk to her after you made out with some random girl, huh?”

“I didn’t make out with any girl, partner. Except for your sister, of course.” Arthur faked a smile. “Besides, I explained everything to her. I think it’s safe to say we’re good, but it’s great you care for her.”

A muscle in Jaime’s jaw twitched as he gritted his teeth. With the corner of your eye, you could see him clenching his fists till his knuckles went white. _Oh, it couldn’t end up well._ Especially when he approached him, glaring at him the whole time.

“I’m gonna tell you this for one last time…” Jaime hissed. “My sister is out of your reach, so get the fuck out of here and leave her alone!”

“Oh, is she?” Arthur asked him ironically. “She wasn’t out of my reach when she slept with me a few weeks ago.”

You froze. You did not know what to expect from your brother reaction, but you were sure he would not be pleased. Not even a bit.

“I will fucking kill you, you prick!” Jaime jumped down Arthur’s throat. Before he could react, Jaime hit him hard in the nose. Time seemed to slow down as you watched Arthur backing away, his right hand reaching to his nose. His eyes watered as he touched the blood that streamed down on his lips and looked at the red liquid on his hand.

“Well, well…” He said to your brother. “That’s all you got?”

You could see the fury in Jaime’s eyes as he was about to hit Arthur again, but this time he missed. Arthur dodged and used the opportunity to punch him in the stomach. Jaime moaned and bowed down from pain caused by Arthur’s hit. He could not breathe, but it was not enough for his opponent who finished him off by hitting him in the face with a knee. Jaime stumbled with his face also covered in blood from the bleeding nose.

_It has gone too far. What the hell they thought they were doing?_

“Enough!!! Jaime, Arthur, stop!” You screamed and stood between them, separating them with your hands. “Don’t act like children, for god’s sake…”

“I won’t let him go away with this!” Jaime yelled and pulled out his gun, pointing it at Arthur. “No one treats my sister like that!”

“You’re out of your goddamn mind, Jaime!” You snapped at him, standing before Arthur, covering his body with yours. “You shoot him, you shoot me, so you’d better low your gun!”

He was not listening to you and you could feel your heart racing so fast, it would jump out of your chest if it could. Your left hand wandered back and found Arthur’s, squeezing it tightly. You had heard Arthur pulling out his gun and reloading it above your head before he pointed it at Jaime.

“You heard your sister. Low your gun.” He said harshly to your brother.

“N-no…” Jaime stammered. “You’re dead man, Arthur Morgan!”

 _Was it really happening? Was your brother really pointing his gun at you and Arthur?_ You shivered, squeezing Arthur’s hand even harder than you did before. You were petrified and did not know what to do. _This could not be real, this could not be happening…_

A sound of shooting gun scared you even more, but then you realised it was your father who shot a gun out of Jaime’s hand. You brother moaned as his right hand started to bleed, scratched by Thomas’ shot. He automatically pushed it with his other hand to stop the bleeding.

“What the hell you three are doing?!” Mr Blackburn asked furiously. “Have you all gone mad, pointing guns at each other?!”

“Dad, it’s his fault! He provoked me…” Jaime started explaining himself, but Arthur interrupted him.

“I provoked you? I was just talking to Y/N when you came out of nowhere and started threating me!”

“Because you slept with my sister!”

“And why do you even care? It’s not your goddamn business, it’s hers!” Arthur fired back. “You can’t tell your sister who she can sleep with!”

“Enough!” Thomas fired his gun in the air. “You two need to calm down. Now.”

“But…” As always, Jaime could not let go.

“I said enough!” Your dad repeated and turned to you. “Take Arthur inside and patch him up. I need to talk to your brother… Alone.”

You nodded confirmingly and instantly pulled Arthur behind you to the kitchen, closing the doors as you two went in. You sighed as you saw him sitting on the chair, giving you a moment to gather your thoughts.

“Why did you tell my brother about us?” You asked, breaking the silence in the room.

“Didn’t you see how he treated me? I don’t deserve to be treated like garbage as I haven’t done anything wrong, Y/N.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have told him. You know how he reacts.” You approached Arthur with a wet kitchen rag. You wiped away the blood out of his face gently, trying not to cause him any more pain.

“I know, but I also know you’re not his property and he has no right to treat you like you were one.” He said as you finished cleaning his nose. Thank god, _it was not broken, just bruised_.

“You’re right… But still, I didn’t want him to find out about this… Like that.” You confessed, putting the rag away on the wooden table. You sat down on the chair next to Arthur and sighed again. “Oh, Arthur…”

“Hmmm?” He hummed.

“I hope my dad won’t be too harsh for him. I want to believe that Jaime had good intentions…”

“He did,” Arthur assured you. “He just… I don’t know. Maybe he can’t get over the fact that there’s another important man in your life now?”

“Who do you mean?”

“I mean the guy you wanted to protect from getting shot today… He’s one lucky man to have ya.” He leaned down to you and grabbed your chin gently, lifting it up a little so your lips were pretty close. “But for the future, remember, he’s the one to protect you. Not otherwise.”

“Mhm… Sure.” You said and then let him steal a kiss from you. His lips brushed yours gently, teasingly, leaving you craving for more. “What was that for?”

“Nothing,” Arthur smirked, brushing your bottom lip with his thumb. “I just couldn’t resist.”

“You know we still have a lot to talk about?”

“I do. We have plenty of time for talking.” He replied and kissed you again before you could say something in reply.

You closed your eyes and indulged in the kiss, indulged in the rough touch of his harsh lips and for a second forgot about the whole world around you. You did not even think that someone might be watching you through the open kitchen window. Someone who was not pleased with what he saw and was desperate to do anything to separate you and Arthur.

_But you had no idea about that back then._

You were happy and full of hope that everything will be alright. But deep inside, you knew it was only wishful thinking, right?


	6. Good at goodbyes

Life has been really quiet for the past few weeks. Maybe even too quiet, but it was exactly what Arthur and you needed, considering what you have been through lately. Although Jaime was still angry at you both, your father kept him away from causing any more problems. He also made sure that Arthur would keep his cool in his son’s presence - he did not want to see these two fighting anymore. _They were two grown adults, for god’s sake_.

So practically, they avoided each other at all cost. What was not so bad, after all - you could be sure that they would not kill each other... at least for a while. 

Everything was going back to normal. Oh, maybe except one thing - James was visiting you more than usual, annoying Arthur at the same time. He explained it was just because he was worried about you and wanted to make sure you were alright. At first, you found that sweet of him - but with time, his visits became annoying for you too. 

_He has never visited you this often before. What the hell has gotten into him?_

“I don’t like that guy, Y/N,” Arthur said to you one day as you were lying beside him on the grass nearby your house. “He’s so fucking annoying when he’s around.”

“No way. Is that possible that you’re jealous, Arthur?” You teased him, turning to the side and caressing his rough cheek.

“Me? No…” He denied, but you could tell that he was lying. “Not at all.”

“Good.” You ignored his little lie and turned his head towards yours. “Because you’re the only man for me. There’s nothing for you to worry about.”

He smirked as you moved closer to him and your lips met in a subtle kiss. His stubble was scratching your soft cheeks and you grinned in response. Before you could notice, Arthur grabbed your leg and moved you on top of him, so you were straddling him, the strands of your hair touched his face as you hovered over him.

“My girl...” He whispered to your ear. “All mine.”

“Yours.” You assured him. “You’re a possessive man, Arthur Morgan.”

“I never said I wasn’t.” He smiled at you. “Oh, I’m glad I found you on that road back then.”

You had smiled back at him and kissed him once more before you laid back next to him again. It was a beautiful, warm afternoon and you were so happy you could share it with him. _You wished you could stay there forever, just you two - how perfect would it be? Way too perfect to be true, for sure…_

“Arthur!” A high-pitched, girl’s voice dragged you both out of your thoughts. “I’ve got a letter for you!”

“A letter?” Arthur got up and was already sitting when Ellie handed him a white envelope without any information written on it. “Where did you get that from?”

“A young lady brought it a moment ago… She was so pretty! She asked about you and then asked me to give you this…” The girl explained and smiled shyly. “Don’t be mad, Arthur…”

“I’m not mad, sweetheart.” He comforted her. “But next time someone asks about me, come to me first.”

“Alright, Ellie.” You stood up and grabbed her little hand. “Let’s give Arthur some privacy, okay? I’m sure you’re already hungry. Will you help me with dinner?”

“I’d love to!” The girl clapped her hands happily.

“I will join you, girls, in a moment,” Arthur said then smiled at Ellie and you.

You walked away with your sister, looking over your shoulder as Arthur opened the letter and unfolded the piece of white paper. He started reading, his eyes getting bigger with every word he read. It was not long as he finished reading soon and put it back in the envelope. You turned your head, so he would not catch you staring at him and sped your pace, disappearing from his sight quickly.

You immediately began to wonder who was this letter from and what had Arthur read that made him look this shocked. _Would it be appropriate if you asked him about it? Or maybe it was something private?_ There was no information who was it from on the envelope… It must be a private matter so you decided to let it go for now, or at least wait for Arthur to tell you about it. However, curiosity inside you was growing despite your biggest efforts to tame it.

Oh, your mother used to tell you that curiosity killed a cat.

But you never listened.

*

“Dad, you still don’t understand… I only did what I did because I care about, Y/N.” Jaime said as Ellie and you entered the kitchen. “Arthur is no good…”

“For me?” You asked with irony in your voice. “Shame that deciding who is good for me is not up to you anymore.”

“I have always cared about you. I ain’t gonna stop because you tell me not to.” He stated and looked around as if he was searching for someone. “Where’s that douche?”

“Jaime, watch your tongue!” Your dad banged his fists on the table. “You two are not gonna fight here, not in my house, not in front of me! What happened to both of you? You might not have always been on the same page, but you have always gotten along!”

“I can’t get along with him if he can’t respect a man I’m with!” You exclaimed and then realise Ellie was still standing by your side. You crouched next to her and said: “Go and play outside. Please.”

She did as you asked her and left as Jaime raised his voice.

“You’re with? I thought you two were just sleeping with each other!”

“I can’t listen to you two…” Your dad stood up and approached the door leading to the yard and opened it. “I’m gonna go and play with Ellie. You two are not allowed to leave this room until you make up. Understood?”

“Dad…” You said, but your dad had no patience to listen.

“Understood?!” He repeated and slammed the door as he walked outside.

You were left in two, looking at each other with hatred. After a moment, you sat down on the chair in front of Jaime and waited for him to say anything. _He did not._ He was looking at you then through the window alternately with his dark brown eyes.

“What’s your problem?” You asked as the level of frustration was too high for you to handle. “Because god, I have no idea why you’re so angry.”

“What’s my problem? Didn’t I make myself clear earlier? Arthur is my goddamn problem! He showed up out of nowhere and messed with your head and what’s funny, it was me who invited him here! That’s why I’m angry…”

“Oh god... Can’t you see he makes me happy?” You asked embittered. “Why can’t you just be happy for me, huh?”

“Because he’s only gonna break your heart like he almost did when I told that girl to hit on him…”

“Wait… What did you say?” It all started to make sense at that moment. _How did you not realize that earlier?_ “You did that?!”

“Yes, I did! I also asked James to come by more often, you know why? Because he’s still in love with you, but you’re too blind to notice that!” Jaime stood up and started walking nervously around the kitchen. “It’s always been you and me, taking care of dad and Ellie! We were inseparable…”

“What’s wrong with you, Jaime!?” You shouted at him. “What the fuck were you thinking? Fuck, it’s all your fault! You’re living in that bubble you created, thinking that I will stay with you forever as your beloved sister! I’m so sick of you and your games! And you even brought James into this… What on earth have you told him?”

“The truth - that deep inside you still love him too.”

“You’re willing to do anything to keep me away from Arthur and make me stay with you, aren’t you? Then watch me as I’m leaving you. Right now. ” You stood up and tried to walk to the door but he grabbed your arm, squeezing it painfully and stopped you from doing so. “Ouch, it hurts, Jaime!”

“You’re not going anywhere!”

“Aren’t I?” You turned towards him quickly and slapped his cheek with your spare hand. “Get your fucking hands off me!”

“What the hell is going on here?!” The doors opened and your father stormed inside and with one move separated you two from each other.

“Go on, dear brother, explain to dad how fucking crazy you’re!” You shouted and wanted to slap him again, but your dad stopped you. “Did you know about it, dad? That it was Jaime who made that girl in saloon flirt with Arthur the other night? Oh, and that he also told James I still have feelings for him?”

“Did you, Jaime…?” The man asked his son. “Don’t fucking lie to me, son…”

“I did… But…” His voice cracked and he hung his head.

“I thought you were better than this.” Thomas shook his head in a gesture of disappointment. “It doesn’t matter what you think of Arthur, boy, as long as he is here, under my roof, I want you to respect him.”

“I’m sorry, I-”

“You’re a grown man, but dumb like a child....”

“Y/N… I’m…” Jaime looked up at you, but you were not in the mood for hearing his apologies out.

“Whatever it is, spare it.” You stated and on your way out of the kitchen, you added. “I’m done with listening to your empty words, Jaime.”

At that moment, to say you were angry would be an underestimation. You were furious. All you could think was how could Jaime do something so terrible to you and yet he had no regrets if it was not for your father intervention. He could have ruined everything by his reckless actions. _Everything_. That was the only thing you could not force yourself to forgive. 

_But as it turned out, he had not had to do anything as everything was about to be ruined within seconds._

Just as you went outside from the other side of the house, you saw Arthur saddling his horse as if he was preparing himself to leave. Your eyes widen and your heart started to race faster - _what the hell was he doing?_

“Hey, what’s going on?” You asked as you ran towards him. 

“It’s about that letter…” Arthur turned to you and handed you the piece of paper. “See that name?”

“Sadie Adler?” You slowly read words that he pointed. “Who’s that?”

“An old friend of mine. I need to go and find her as soon as possible. If she found me that means anyone else can find me too and I can’t risk getting found here. It would only put you all in danger.”

“No, no, don’t you fucking dare to leave me…” You said, realising what was he about to do. _Suddenly your worst nightmare became a reality_. “Arthur, I beg you…”

“I can’t stay here. Not until I know who else knows about me being alive.” Arthur turned his head away, so he would not look at you. “I don’t want it to be goodbye…”

“Please…” You cried out. “Don’t leave…”

He forced himself to look at you and with glowing from tears eyes as he leaned down to kiss your forehead. You cupped his face, brushing away the single tear that fell on his cheek with your thumb.

“I don’t want to leave, but I have to.” He said and wanted to look away again, but you forced him to look you in the eyes again. “All my life I’ve been running… Even if it was for a brief moment, this place felt like home to me.”

“Then don’t...”

“I can’t.” He had whispered and brushed your lips with his for the last time before he turned away and mounted his horse. “But I hope this time I won’t be gone for long.”

You watched him riding away, leaving only dust behind his back. The tears streamed down your face, the silent cry escaped your mouth and suddenly you fell on your knees, covering your face in your hands. Many thoughts were in your head at that moment, but you could not focus on any of them. It hurt. _Oh, watching him leave almost killed you._

But you knew tomorrow another day would come.

And your brother would finally be able to tell you ‘ _told you so_ ’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not the end tho! It's just the beginning... ;)


	7. What friends are for

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Arthur is away your best friend comes back and you can be sure as hell that she will not let you make mistakes from the past ever again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's suppose Bonnie is in her twenties in this story (like twenty-five or something)... 😉 I know, I know, I made her older... but it's all for the story (and I think it's nice to have her as a friend!).

“Y/N, wake up! Wake up, wake up!”

A squeaking voice dragged you out of your sleep. Well, you were not sleeping, sobbing almost the whole night into your pillow, but in the morning you managed to get an hour of sweet rest. You opened your eyes lazily and then you were blinded by the rays of sunlight that came through the window in front of your bed.

“Ellie, not now…” You groaned, turning to your other side. Your eyes were swollen, stingy and what mattered the most, you did not want her to see you were crying. “Go to Jaime or dad…”

“But dad told me to come to you!” Ellie stated and climbed on the bed. “When will Arthur return? He’s always wanted to play with me...”

You were not prepared to hear this question from her. You felt a twinge in your heart and tears filled up your eyes again. She had no clue that Arthur might have been gone forever. She had no idea he left you without a word of explanation. She did not know...

“I d-don’t know, pumpkin.” There was a gulp in your throat and your voice was cracking as you spoke. “I don’t know whether he will come back at all.”

“Why wouldn’t he come back? What happened?” Ellie kept asking you questions you did not know answers to. You turned your head and looked at her, letting the tears fell on your cheeks. “Y/N, why are you crying? Please, don’t cry…”

You were about to respond to her when the doors from your bedroom opened and your dad entered, holding two cups of coffee in his hands. He smiled brightly at his younger daughter and then nodded at the doors behind his back.

“Ellie, enough of these questions.” He commanded. “Ms MacFarlane came to visit us, why don’t you go and say hi to her?”

“Bonnie’s here?” You asked, suddenly full of enthusiasm, and raised yourself on your elbows. By the time you ended your question, Ellie was already gone and you and your father were just in two in your bedroom. Thomas closed the doors and placed the cups he was holding on your night shelf.

“Yes, she’s talking to Jaime right now.” He said while he sat at the edge of your bad. His hand stroke your forehead, brushing off the strands of hair from it. “You can’t go on like that, Y/N. I’ve heard you crying for the whole night…”

“I know… I just… I miss Arthur.”

“I know you do, love.” He was staring at you with empathy. “What I also know is that he wouldn’t want to see you this way. I’m pretty sure he would want you to live your life the best way you possibly can.”

“How can I do that? I was living my best life with him. Now… I don’t know what to do.”

“Oh, monkey… I wish your mother was here… I’m not good at this.” The man sighed loudly. “I just want you to know that all I’ve ever wanted for my children is happiness. Therefore, it breaks my heart to see you like that.”

He leaned towards you and hugged you tightly just when someone knocked on the doors. A few seconds later a young woman slid inside your bedroom, shutting the door behind her back. An awkward smile appeared on her face as she looked around the room, realising you were not there alone.

“Bonnie! Y/N!” Jaime shouted, trying to open the doors from the outside. “Open up!”

“Get lost, Jaime!” She shouted back, turning the key in the lock. “Mr Blackburn. Y/N.”

“Couldn’t stay away from me, could you?” You subconsciously smiled at her and got up to greet her with one, tight hug.

“Your brother told me what had happened… I’m so sorry for you, Y/N.” She whispered as you two were holding each other.

“It’s nothing.” You said firmly even though you knew it was a lie. “I mean a past few days have been hard…”

“You fool, we have known each other for years. Even if you tried you wouldn’t fool me.” Bonnie pulled away and looked at you closely. You have been wearing old Arthur’s shirt and ripped trousers, so it did not take long for her to realise you were a walking mess. “I have an idea. You have five minutes to get changed and then we’re going out of here. We’re gonna have some drinks and catch up on lost time. What do you say?”

“Aren’t you here for business?” You asked, looking at your dad discreetly.

“Oh, I know your father won’t mind me stealing you for some time. Right, Mr Blackburn?”

“Not at all. Take her anywhere you want, Bonnie.” Your old man laughed and approached the door. He unlocked it and Jaime stormed in. “Come on, son, let’s leave the girls alone. We have much work to do.”

“MacFarlane!” Jaime breathed out, brushing longer strands of his brown hair off his forehead. “I turned around just for a second…”

“It’s not my fault you’re getting slow, Blackburn…” She laughed at him then poked his arm teasingly.

“Jaime,” Thomas grunted and pulled his son with him as he walked outside the room. “Let’s go.”

Jaime had looked at Bonnie quickly before he left and she blushed gently, feeling his sight on her. When she realised you were staring at her, she came back from her thoughts and coughed significantly. Oh, Bonnie. She did not change a bit since the last time you saw her. She was still this smiling girl you remembered. Your best friend.

“How long has it been? A year?” You mocked her and eventually started to look out for decent clothes to put on in your closet. “You and Jaime will never get over each other.”

“Don’t even start…” She huffed. “And hurry up, we’re gonna talk on the road.”

*

Fifteen minutes later, you were already on your way to Blackwater. It was already hot outside so you quickly thanked yourself for choosing a thick, blue dress with white elements and uncovered arms rather than dark trousers and a shirt because you would certainly melt in those.

“It’s not a coincidence that you dropped by, is it?” You searched for a better way to start a conversation, but it was all you could think of.

“No, it’s not. Jaime wrote to me, asking for help. In the letter he sent to me, he seemed pretty worried about you so I wasted no time and came as soon as I could.” Bonnie replied as she rode on her white horse side by side with you.

“I thought you and Jaime were not on speaking terms since... “

“These are old times, Y/N. I moved forward and I hope he also did.” She smiled at you and fixed her blonde bun quickly. “Besides, it’s about you, not him.”

“He didn’t move on, Bonnie. He might tell you he did, but he is my brother.” You sighed heavily. “And even though he was pissing me off so much lately, I truly care about him and what’s the most important - I know when he’s lying.”

A smile vanished from her face as she looked down, shaking her head slowly. “I know you do… It’s just… I don’t know what I could say to you right now.”

“But enough of that. What did happen to you?” She changed the subject quickly. “I’ve heard a version of Jaime, but I’m more curious about yours.”

“There’s a man I care about deeply, but apparently, there are some unknown reasons why we can’t be together. At least not for now, but still, it’s killing me.” You explained to her and she nodded conformingly at you.

“I think I’ve heard a similar story before.” She chuckled. “So, from what Jaime has written to me, I know that… Arthur, right? He left you unexpectedly and gave you no explanation?”

“Yes. He didn’t tell me much about what happened and why he did have to leave. But the moment he left I felt… Abandoned? Like I gave him all of me, trusted him and suddenly he disappeared without any explanation.”

“Is it possible that something might have happened… And he just could not tell you for your safety? You know what people say, the lesser you know the safer you are.”

“Are you trying to justify him now?”

“I’m just trying to think rational, Y/N because Jaime was detailed in the description of the whole situation and if I can be honest with you, I think that Arthur truly cares about you. I don’t know the man, but the way your brother writes about him… I just don’t think he would leave you just like that, without a good reason. He just didn’t tell you about it yet and I’m sure he has his reasons.”

“Bonnie, oh, Bonnie...” You chuckled. “Why do you always have a point in what you’re saying?”

“That’s just the way I’m.” She shrugged, but after a moment she laughed at herself. “Oh, god, I missed you telling me how amazing I’m, Y/N.”

“I missed you too, Bon. I really did.”

*

Spending some time in the Blackwater’s saloon with Bonnie, talking and catching up on things you both missed in each other lives made you stop obsessively thinking about how Arthur was doing. For a moment, all these things became distant and with every drink, it was easier not to think at all for you. First time in a week, you felt decent or maybe even relieved, but something was telling you that you would regret this way of dealing with problems in the morning. It was harder than you thought to catch up with Bonnie when it came to drinking.

“One last round?” Bonnie asked, downing her whiskey. “Then I’m gonna get you home.”

“One last round.” You agreed and placed your empty glass next to her. “I have to ask you something, but don’t get mad. Are you gonna stay with us, Bon?”

“I would love to, but I have to go back to the ranch. You know my father hates when I’m not around for a long time.” She replied and turned towards the bartender. “Two more whiskeys, please.”

“Coming right at you.” The man said automatically.

“Just a few more days, please? For me? I’m sure your father won’t be mad if he heard you stayed here for me…”

She sighed and tapped the counter with her fingers nervously.

“You know, Y/N, I’m gonna tell you something... I don’t want things to be awkward, especially when Jaime is around. When things ended up between us it got weird to be around him for me. I know he might want us to get back together, Y/N, maybe you would like it to happen too, but the thing is I’m not sure whether I would like the same thing.” She sighed when the bartender placed two full glasses in front of you. “It’s not like I don’t miss your brother, because I do, but… We’re not good for each other.”

“Oh, Bonnie… Cut on bullshit, alright? That’s the poorest excuse I’ve ever heard in my entire life.” You prodded at her arm with your finger. “And you say I’m the one who makes poor excuses!”

“Because you’re better...” She chuckled, leaning back with her hands raised in the air. “But yes, guilty as charged, sheriff, but still I don’t plan on staying. I just wanted to see you and cheer you up a little.”

You shook your head disapprovingly and opened your mouth to say something to her, but before you could do so, someone approached you from behind and put his arms around you.

“Hi there, ladies.” You recognized the familiar voice and turned your head to see James behind you.

“James Harding.” Bonnie had given you a questioning look before she moved her sight to the man behind your back. “I didn’t expect to see you here. To be honest, I didn’t expect to see you at all.”

“Bonnie MacFarlane, sarcastic as always,” James said and sent her a cocky smile. She rolled up her eyes and then downed her drink, trying not to say anything malicious in return.

Bonnie never liked James, even when you two used to be together a few years ago; she always thought he was a jerk; someone you should have never wasted a time on. However, she never knew his as well as you did and her judgement was only based on what she saw. You, on the other hand, knew him better than that; for you, he was a good man, someone who was always there for you, someone you fell for a long time ago. Of course, he had his flaws, but you thought you could change him for the better. But in the end, Bonnie was right; no matter how hard you tried you could not change him and experienced on your skin this one thing - people never change or at least not when someone wants them to do so.

“After all this time, you’re still mad at me?” James asked as he notices Bonnie was glaring at him.

“I guess it will never change.” She shrugged and patted your thigh. “Come on, Y/N, let’s get going.”

“Leaving so soon?” He had leaned down before you could move and placed his chin on your left arm. You did not move as his black stubble brushed your neck and his hands wandered on your waist. “Don’t ruin the fun, Bonnie! You could at least give me a chance to prove I’m not the man you used to know.”

“We were having fun until you showed up.” She hissed, clearly angry at you when she noticed you were not hesitating and let him cross the borders of your personal space. “Y/N, do you want to stay with him?”

You did not know what to tell her, torn between a desire of staying in a saloon longer and common sense. You were sure it would be wiser if you listened to your common sense, but at the same time you were overwhelmed by recent events, you did not want to go back to your house, to these empty walls, to the thought of Arthur who…

“Are you even considering it?” She asked with a regret in her voice after you did not reply for a moment.

“We’re not in the hurry.” You shrugged and shoved his hands off your waist. “We could drink one more whiskey before we go. But James, try to keep your hands to yourself or do I need to remind you we’re not together anymore?”

“I can’t see your new man anywhere.” He said while looking around. “Brave of him, I must give him that. I would never let you go out without me.”

“Oh, I know, James. That’s one of many reasons we’re not together anymore.” You noticed Bonnie smirked and you did the same. “So the last round on me?”

“Let it be on me.” James huffed and backed off from you, leaning his right elbow on the encounter. He asked the bartender for three whiskeys and when the man placed them in front of you, he raised his glass in a toast. “To the man who stole you from me, because damn, he’s one, lucky bastard.”

“Ah ah, James. He didn’t steal me from you.” You corrected him. “You made me walk away.”

You three looked at each other awkwardly, surrounded by uncomfortable silence. Somehow the music in saloon stopped playing, making the situation even more inconvenient.

“Cheers to that,” Bonnie spoke first, overwhelmed by the tension between you two. She downed her drink and you followed her; as your glasses touched the wooden counter she got up and fixed her dress, waiting for you to do the same. “It’s not gonna work, James, no matter how hard you will try, you will never change. You will still remain a douche.”

“I really hoped you changed, James. You were visiting me, pretending you cared while you were waiting for an opportunity to hit on me again?” You joined Bonnie on your way out. “And I was such a fool hoping you were better than that.”

“Y/N!” He called out your name but you were not listening to him anymore.

Just as the sun hid behind the horizon, you and Bonnie left the saloon, mounted your horses and rode away, ending this evening before it could really begin. 


	8. Family bonds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You make things up with your brother and soon after that, you are about to face a real threatening possibility. In the meantime, Arthur meets Sadie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s short, I know, but I’m happy I managed to publish it before the end of the decade 😉 Happy new year!

The evening ended faster than you had expected and as soon as you entered your house, you felt that piercing emptiness in your chest. All the emotions you have been hiding for all day came back to you and stroke you with increased strength.

You leaned against the front door as you went inside and closed them behind your back. The tears fell on your cheeks and the sadness filled you up again in no time.

You did not want to be alone. More, you could not be alone because it would only make you feel much worse at that moment. So when you went upstairs you knew you would not go to your bedroom and before you managed to think about it, you ended up knocking on Jamie’s doors.

“Come in.” The voice came from inside.

“Hey, stranger.” You greeted your brother who was already lying in his bed. He had not put out the candle on his night shelf so you could see his sleepy face in dim light. “I didn’t mean to wake you up, I…”

„You didn’t wake me. I couldn’t sleep anyway.” Jaime interrupted you and turned to look at you. “Where’s Bonnie?”

“On her way home.” You said, sitting at the edge of his bed. “She didn’t want to stay, but said she would pay us another social call in a few weeks.”

“Yeah… “ Jaime sighed, clearly disappointed Bonnie did not come back with you. “What’s going on, pumpkin? Did you have fun in Blackwater? Bonnie managed to take your mind off your problems?”

“It was alright. James saw us there and you know, since you told him some bullshit about my feelings for him, he wanted us, especially me, to stay there longer. We didn’t want it so he got angry, but we blew him off and left.” Your brother gave you a questioning look. “I meant it when I told you that I don’t care about him anymore. I stopped caring a long time ago… Besides, Bonnie was with me and you know her attitude towards James.”

“I know. I’m also aware that we haven’t been on the best terms lately because of what I did… And I’m so sorry for my behaviour. Still, I want you to know that I’m here for you.” He smiled briefly, looking at the dying candle. “I… I know I can be difficult, but it’s only because I care about you a lot. I don’t want anything bad happens to you.”

You looked at him with understanding and nodded approvingly. You did not want to fight with him. Not tonight. He was your brother, after all, and who should you forgive mistakes if not your family?

“And I didn’t stop caring for Bonnie even though it’s been a while… Even though she was the first to dump me.” Jaime laughed bitterly. “Why are you still sitting over there? Come on, there’s plenty of space next to me.”

“You will find someone new.” You had kicked down your boots before you moved further on the bed and laid down next to him. “Who knows? Maybe someone even better than Bonnie?”

“I don’t know… I’m not getting younger, dearest sister.”

“You’re twenty-seven, so cut the bullshit.” You pointed, getting comfortable in his bed. “Thank god that you have a double bed.”

“But it’s true… I never had time for girls, you know that. Maybe my time has already passed… I’m gonna end up as a greedy old man.”

“You’re already greedy.” You joked but you were the only one to laugh. “Oh, come on, Jaime! I ain’t gonna lecture you tonight, it’s too late for that, but I’m gonna talk to your sense in the morning.”

“Talk to my sense, hm?” Jaime poked you in the arm. “I think I will have to talk to yours because you only come to sleep with me when you have a serious problem.”

“I just don’t want to be alone tonight. It’s easier not to think about… About him when you’re around.” You said and Jaime lifted himself to blow out the candle. “Your presence has always been kinda comforting to me.”

“I’m glad to hear that.” He said as the room went dark. “To be clear, I don’t mind you sleeping here. I can keep an eye on you.”

“Ain’t that a little too creepy?” You asked and giggled quietly. “I know what you meant though.”

“So what’s bothering you?” Jamie changed the subject, coming back to what he was saying earlier. “Spit it out.”

You had thought for the answer for a long while before you said:

“I guess I’m scared that Arthur won’t come back.” You murmured, feeling a single tear on your cheek. “This is the thing that scares me the most.”

“He will come back. You just have to be patient.” He yawned. “Sorry about that. I think you have to wait it out. Let him do whatever he has to before he comes back. If he doesn’t, I will hunt him down myself.”

“Jaime!” You scolded him, but at the same time smiled in the dark, realising that your brother’s attitude towards Arthur changed for the better. “What changed your mind?”

“Maybe you were right about James being a treacherous douche. I wish I could notice how he was treating you earlier. I mean… With Arthur, you were always happy. I can’t say the same about you while you were with James.”

“So we have your blessing?”

“Don’t go that far…” Jaime chuckled. “There’s a long way ahead before that will happen. First, you have to get some rest. It’s late.”

“Okay, okay… I will try.” You curled up under the quilt.

“I will be here all the time.” His hand reached out for yours and squeezed it gently. “Sweet dreams.”

But the dreams you had that night were anything but sweet.

*

You woke up in the morning, feeling nauseating the moment you opened up your eyes. Your brother was sleeping calmly on the other side of the bed, so it meant that it was too early to get up. You forced yourself to lay down for a few more minutes, trying to focus on your breathing and hoping it would help with nausea you were having.

“You okay?” Jaime turned around towards you lazily.

“I don’t feel well…” You got up and quickly walked across Jaime’s bedroom to the window. You opened it with one, swift move, letting some fresh air inside. “God, I think I’m gonna puke.”

“You want a bucket?” He asked and started to get up from the bed.

“No, no, go back to sleep.” You stopped him. “I’m gonna go downstairs and get more fresh air.”

Jaime nodded and came back to sleep while you left and quickly walked outside, trying not to make much noise on your way out. The sun was just about to rise but still was hidden behind the clouds. You took a look at the beautiful view, letting the fresh air fill your lungs but despite your hopes, it didn’t help. Soon, you found yourself vomiting behind your house, using a wall to lean against it when you eventually finished.

As you calmed down enough to start thinking again, you began to look for the reason why you felt this nauseous. You could not remind yourself of eating anything unfresh so it had to be a stomach flu. It had to be it, otherwise…

You started counting days from your last period. There was a chance it could happen, of course, you had sex with Arthur, but you were always careful and you always made sure it was not your fertile days. But what if…

Five days late, if you counted it right. It had happened before to you, so there was a chance it happened again. Still, the possibility of becoming a mother while the father of the baby was gone was terrifying for you. If there was one thing you certainly want for your child was its father to be there for him. Or her.

You swallowed loudly, realising you were overthinking it. It was not one hundred per cent sure that you were pregnant. Your period could simply be late.

However, the thought of having sex with Arthur, no matter how glorious it was, did not help you with no overthinking.

Not at all.

*

“I can’t believe my eyes. You’re alive.”

“Good to see you too, Sadie,” Arthur said, dismounting his horse.

He came a long way to meet her on a prairie, far away from the prying eyes of bounty hunters. She wrote about this place in the letter he received from her, a crossroad near the Armadillo.

“Why here?” He asked her as she approached him and hugged him tightly.

“You’re known in Blackwater, Arthur. It was not hard to find you, especially when many people in town talk about you. They say you’re seeing some girl, the daughter of someone named Blackburn. He is said to be one of the richest ranchers over there.” Sadie spoke and Arthur was listening to her closely. “I didn’t ask about you, just were on a bounty in Blackwater and heard people talking. There was a young man, James… James Harding, I think. A pretty face, but nothing more. He was talking about that girl, rancher’s daughter. He said he was about to marry her, but she turned him down. Some other girl in the saloon said he was the one to blame, cheating on her…”

“Sadie, why are you telling me all this?” He interrupted her.

“Being with that girl doesn’t help you, Arthur. You’re still a wanted man and she makes a noise around her and… You.” She explained, looking down as if she said something wrong. “I want you to be happy because, from all of us, you deserved it the most. But at the same time, you have to stay low. Don’t make such a noise, because people are still looking for you.”

“Who precisely?”

“Bounty hunters… Not many, but still there are some.”

“Pinkertons?”

“I haven’t heard of them nor seen any.” She sighed. “Arthur, that’s not the point. I wanted to see you and remind you that you have to be careful.”

“I’m careful, Sadie. Enough of me…” He gestured with his hands. “What about the others? John… Did he make it?”

“I don’t know that. What I know is that Micah is out there… Moving, so I can’t find him, but I will, Arthur, I promise you that…”

“Stay away from him, Sadie. He ain’t worth it.”

“What about revenge?”

“Revenge?” Arthur laughed and she looked at him surprised. “I have a beautiful girl waiting for me and you think I will seek revenge? I want to keep her safe, not to realise my sick needs.”

“You’re in love with her, aren’t you?” Sadie smirked. “Oh, Arthur… Come on, let’s ride. I ain’t gonna change your mind about Micah, but I want you to tell me more about her. The middle of prairie is not the best place, don’t you think?”

“Sure. Let’s get out of here.” He agreed and a moment later, he joined her on his horse. “Where to?”

“The drink in the heart of West sounds good to me.” She said.

“Armadillo?”

“Like hell, it is.”


	9. The return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arthur and Sadie make up for lost time in Armadillo while you face the person who can not let go of the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s been a while. Literally. I was planning to post it tomorrow, but you waited too long for this. Good to write _After_ again. Thank you so much for being this patient with me. You all are the best.

It was late afternoon when Arthur and Sadie arrived in Armadillo, hitching up their horses to the hitch posts next to the saloon. They went inside and took a seat next to the encounter, looking suspiciously at each man that passed them by. It has been a while since they saw each other the last time; it has been a while, but the old habits seemed to still be alive. When they fell apart, they all were wanted men and despite all this time and all the distance they have come through, it has not changed; not in their minds, at least.

“She really has to be someone special for you,” Sadie spoke when Arthur finished telling her his story, smirking at him from above her bottle “since you decided to stay in one place for this long.”

“I’m done running, Sadie,” he responded, moving his pointing finger on the edge of the glass. “I’ve been on the run for my whole life and all I want now is…”

“Home,” she finished for him. “I should’ve figured it out myself.”

“All I ever wanted was home,” Arthur said and breathed deeply. “You scared me with your letter, you know? Scared me enough to make me leave her, thinking it would be for the better, but it’s not. I should’ve stayed with her because being this far away from her is something… Something I’ve never experienced before. This feeling of longing…”

“Oh Arthur,” she rolled up her eyes. “Just admit it already.”

“Admit what?”

“You’re in love with her,” Sadie pointed. “I know you like to deny your feelings and knowing what you’ve been through…”

“Actually, you’re right,” he said after a long pause. “I think I love her.”

Sadie did not reply, but a light blush appeared on her face as she heard his confession. She grinned and leaned her head against the palm of her hand as looked at Arthur with some kind of pride in her eyes.

Since they have entered the bar and made their orders, Arthur kept telling her what happened after they all split. He told her about the lonely days, even lonelier nights he has been trough; he was on his own and had no idea what to do or where to go and was haunted by the faith of other gang members - did they make it out alive? Were they safe? What happened to them after the gang fell apart? He has been telling her his story with a stone-cold face till he reached the point when he met this young, pretty girl on the road; he did not intend to stop at first, but she enchanted him from the first moment he saw her; there was something special about her, something that Arthur could not explain, but it made him stop and help her. Everything changed at that moment and for the first time since he started speaking, he smirked as the warm memories of her filled his heart and thoughts again.

“I’m happy for you,” she told him eventually. “I truly am.”

“But?” Arthur questioned, feeling there was something left for her to say. 

“No _buts_ ” she laughed. “Do you think it would be possible for me to meet her one day? She seems like a really nice girl from what you’ve been saying about her.”

“There’s a possibility, but you would have to come back to Blackwater with me,” he smiled lightly. “If you’re right and there’s any kind of danger that threatens me and at the same time her, I think it would be good to have you by my side. Thomas Blackburn is a good man and I think you would be welcomed there.”

“What will I have out of it?”

“Well–”

“I’m teasing you, Arthur,” she interrupted him. “I will go there with you and stay around for a while… I was about to search for some good bounties anyway.”

“Very well,” Arthur smirked. “Then what do you say if we finish this round and go?”

***

Last few days have been rough for you, not only because Arthur was gone, but also because you faced reality and realised you were not pregnant. It might have sounded weird, but you really hoped you would be, even though this thought scared the hell out of you at first; but maybe if you were caring his child, he would have enough reasons to come back to you and stay… For good. 

You knew this kind of thinking was not rational and if someone looked at you from aside, you might have seemed pathetic. Keeping a man by your side just because you were pregnant? Mercy. You were better than this, but at that moment you were desperate enough to do anything to get him back. 

You loved him; you loved the mysterious man who rescued you on the road back then; the one with who you should have never fell in love with, but you did and ignored every warning anyone has ever told you. 

Was there any chance he would come back to you? You were hoping so, but the more you waited the harder it was to believe so. The days were passing and there was no sign of Arthur. But he had promised he would go back to you. He had…

But he had not. Not yet, at least. 

Instead, you had this weird feeling in your chest as you walked up the stairs in the evening, going to your bedroom, as if something was about to happen. It has been quiet for too long and from your experience, you knew that peace never lasted too long.

“Is Y/N home?” You heard a familiar voice coming from the outside; the voice you were not expected to hear after your last visit to Blackwater.

Not him. Not now. 

“What do you want from her, James?” Your brother asked immediately, disturbed by James’ presence on the ranch. 

He knew well you were not in the mood to see anyone, especially not James. 

They were talking for a while, but you could not hear what they were saying as their words were blurred and too quiet. You looked through the window just in time to see Jaime pushing James aggressively.

“I’m gonna tell you this one last time. Get out of here and never come back!” Jaime shouted and you knew it was high time for you to show up down there and end this nonsense. They were arguing like children and not only you were annoyed by the noises that came from the outside.

“Jaime!” your father growled, angry at his son’s behaviour. “Enough!” 

“Yes, enough,” you repeated firmly, appearing behind your father’s back. “Jaime, I will handle it.” 

“Your brother is crazy, Y/N,” James said when you stopped in front of him. “He’s lost his mind a long time ago, hasn’t he?”

“What exactly do you want from me?” you asked, ignoring his provocation. “Didn’t I tell you off back in Blackwater? You want me to repeat I’m not interested anymore?” 

“Well, I couldn’t help but notice your loverboy is gone, Y/N… There has been no sign of him in Blackwater for the past few days and I began to wonder… How does it feel? Oh no, wait, I know how it does feel because you’re the one who left me back in the days!” 

“Oh, are you still bitter about it?” you sighed, shaking your head slowly. “I’ve heard many things about you since we fell apart and honestly I think we’re better off without each other… I mean… Just move on, alright? We’re done. We’ve been for a while now, James and you know it.”

You saw the anger filling up his dark eyes and with one quick move, he reached out to his gun and pointed it at you. You heard him reloading it as you put your hands in the air slowly; in the back, you heard your father and brother pulling out his guns and there you were - in the middle of an upcoming crossfire. 

“Don’t do anything stupid, James,” Thomas said, moving carefully towards you. You could see him coming with the corner of your left eye, but you were not able to turn around. Your heart was pounding in your chest and you knew that any wrong move could cause a disaster. “Threatening my daughter with a gun? What kind of a man does it make you?”

“I’ve known her my entire life!” he exclaimed. “She left me! One goddamn mistake and she left! I’ve been trying to fix that for months, but one day some goddamn cowboy appeared and ruined it all!”

“James, I know you’re angry… But it’s not who you are,” you whispered, hoping it would ease his anger. It did not; he fired a warning shot in the air and you shivered, scared by the man in front of you. It was not him. You were not with a man like that in the past.

“One day, I came to talk to you… It was a few days after my birthday. I saw you two kissing in the kitchen, looking so pretty together and then it hit me,” James took a step closer to you. “I’ve never gotten over you. I was such a fool when I let you go… But we were more than lovers. We were best friends.”

“Did you really believe we would still be friends after you cheated on me? I beg you a pardon, but if you did, you were a fool, indeed,” you hissed and noticed Jaime moving slowly towards James; he probably did not see your brother coming as he kept talking.

“All I’ve ever wanted was you and you know it… Now I have a chance to get you back. Let’s talk… We will figure this out, baby.”

“No,” you replied, realising he was not gonna let go. “Not gonna happen.”

“Shame,” James said shortly and time seemed to slow down as he turned around to your brother, who was by his left, and pulled the trigger. The bullet went right through Jaime’s thigh and he fell on the ground, grabbing the place where the blood was coming from. You turned around to look at your father, who was standing where he stood, unmoved, watching his son slowly bleeding out on the ground; you were about to go and help your brother, but then James turned back to you and threatened you with his gun again. “The next time you’re gonna say no, then it’s your daddy’s turn.”

“Why aren’t you doing anything, dad?!” you asked embittered, looking at Jaime.

“Because he knows,” James huffed, “one wrong move and his daughter gets shot.” 

“No,” your father said firmly, “that ain’t the reason.”

“Then wh–” James wanted to ask but he was hit in the head by someone else’s gun; he fell on the ground unconscious and then you saw your saviour. It took you a moment to realise who exactly hit him and for a second you thought that it was a dream. You blinked a few times to make sure you were not hallucinating and then you believed your own eyes.

“You’ve always annoyed me,” Arthur said in James’ direction, putting back his revolver. 

It could have been the perfect reunion where you would run into your man’s arms and kiss him passionately; but then you reminded yourself about your brother who was moaning loudly from the pain, seeking for someone who would help him with the wound.

“Jaime!” you exclaimed when you got to him. “You’re gonna be okay, understood? We will stop the bleeding and will patch you up, I’m so so sorry…”

“It’s a scratch, pumpkin,” he moaned and his lips turned in a grimace. “Fuck…”

“Don’t play tough now,” you said and tears fell on your cheeks. The adrenaline was gone and you felt all the emotions you were trying to hide. “What were you even planning to do?” 

“I wanted to hit him from behind,” Jaime explained. “It didn’t work out as I planned, apparently.” 

“Come on, son,” you did not notice your father who appeared by your Jaime’s side, helping him stand up. “Can you walk?” 

“Barely,” he hissed and at the same time, Arthur neared him, helping him stand from the other side. “Thanks, buddy.”

“We’re buddies now?” Arthur asked and Jaime chuckled in the response.

“Don’t get used to that,” he told him and let them lead him inside the house. 

You did not quite get what was going on around you; it was an emotional rollercoaster and you were in the middle of it confused enough to not notice the woman with the blonde hair and such a pretty face. She must have come with Arthur, you thought as you eyed her carefully. 

“And you’re…” you said uncontrollably, realising it was rude of you to be this direct. “I’m sorry, I meant…”

“I’m Sadie,” the woman replied. “Sadie Adler.”

“Sadie Adler…” you echoed, connecting the facts in your head. 

It was her. She was the reason why Arthur had left. Why on Earth did he bring her here with him? Something was not right, you could feel it the moment she introduced herself to you. 

“You must be Y/N Blackburn, right?” she asked you when you did not say anything in return. 

“Yes, that’s right,” you nodded and squeezed her hand. “Nice to meet you, Sadie.”

“Likewise,” she said and pointed her head at James’ body. “Do you want me to tie him up? He will be unconscious for a while, but you never know…”

“If that’s not a problem for you then yes… My father will deal with him later,” you told her. “Anyway, I should go and check on Jaime. He’s not the nicest person when he’s in pain.”

“Sure thing,” she had replied and smiled at you lightly before she started tying James’ hands and legs. “I will keep an eye on him till your father comes, don’t worry.”

You nodded confirmingly and hurried inside your house, following the sounds of moans and curses that were escaping your brother’s mouth, but your thoughts were still with Sadie and her presence at your ranch. She could not have been here by accident, so why was she here with Arthur? Was there anything that connected them or maybe… No, Arthur would not have done anything like that to you. He was not James and you were overthinking things again. However, something was telling you that Sadie Adler was not here without a reason.

And you were gonna find out what this reason was.


	10. First love never dies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You patch up your brother and after that, you and Arthur have a difficult talk that ends in a very unexpected way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, loves. Here’s another chapter of After (wow, am I really updating it this soon?) and I truly hope you will enjoy it as much as I do. I also hope you’re all doing alright and are safe wherever you are during these crazy times.

A dim light of a candle enlightened your brother’s bedroom as you entered the room in the night, holding some fresh bandages in your hands. Jaime was sitting at the edge of his bed shirtless, holding a cloth pressed to his wound. You glared at him as you placed the bandages on the night shelf and took you one to put around his thigh.

“Y/N, please say something,” Jaime said in a hoarse voice when he saw you, “and don’t look at me this way.”

“You could’ve died, you fool,” you told him and started putting up the bandage around his wound. “You can’t blame me for being mad at you.”

“But I didn’t,” he hissed as you unintentionally pressed his wound too hard, “it’s just a scratch.”

“Yeah, just a scratch,” you repeated, rolling up your eyes. “Damn you man’s pride, Jaime. You’re lucky that the bullet went through your arm. It could’ve been much worse…”

“But it isn’t, so stop it,” he said firmly and when you finished, he moved away and leaned his back against the frame of the bed. “Have you talked to Arthur already?”

“I haven’t,” you admitted and sat down at the edge of Jaime’s bed. “There was no time for that. Do I need to remind you that we also have a little sister? When dad and Arthur were dealing with James, someone needed to look after Ellie…”

“Or right, Ellie… How is she?”

“Fine, I guess. Confused a bit, but she will be okay.”

“Good,” Jaime nodded. “And James?”

“I don’t know,” you shook your head. “Whatever they did to him, I don’t care. I just hope it will be enough to keep him away from our family.”

“I’m sure they took care of it,” your brother said and reached out to your hand, the one you were leaning against and squeezed it gently. “These two wouldn’t let a hair fell from your head.”

You smiled at him gently, trying to express gratitude this way as you could not find words to say. You were so grateful for your family; it has always been the greatest value in your life, especially since your mother passed away and you were just in four: your dad, Jaime, Ellie and you. No one has ever mattered to you more than them. If anything happened to any of them… It was too scary for you to think about. And then, there was also Arthur… A man who appeared out of nowhere and messed with your head enough to make a special place in your heart for him too.

But then he left. He just left and even though you knew he had his reasons, you could not simply forget he did that to you; but maybe it was your fault and you should not have let yourself fall for him so fast? Well, but it was already done, so there was no point in wondering what might have been if you would not let yourself do that.

Someone knocked on the doors and when you turned your head towards them, you saw Arthur taking a step forward and then froze as he noticed you were in the room.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to interrupt…” he said and wanted to leave as soon as he showed up, but your brother decided to take advantage of the situation.

“No, Arthur, you’re not interrupting,” he told him. “Actually, Y/N was about to go and find you, so it’s good you’re already here.”

You turned your head rapidly and glared at Jaime again, angry that he lied to him, even though you knew he did that because you would not do it yourself.

“Yeah, I was just leaving,” you said and got up from the bed. “Come with me, Arthur. We ain’t gonna have this conversation in front of Jaime’s nose, are we?”

You saw your brother winking at you as you two were leaving the room and in response, you shut the doors of his bedroom. You led Arthur to the room next to Jaime’s, your bedroom, and closed the door while he stood next to your bed and was watching carefully every move you made.

“So, you’re back,” you started as you passed him by and sat down on your bed. “How was your travel? I couldn’t help but notice you brought a friend with you.”

“Y/N, I know you’re angry, but…”

“No buts, Arthur. I’m furious and I have every right to feel this way,” you interrupted him and folded your arms. “You know how much you hurt me and yet, you decided to bring some other girl with you here?”

“She’s my friend,” he explained “and I brought her only because she wanted to meet this beautiful girl I couldn’t shut up about.”

You did not reply, trying to hold your anger inside you, but the tears came to your eyes and then fell on your cheeks.

“I’m so sorry I did it to you, but please, know that everything I’ve done was to protect you,” he kept speaking. “I ain’t saint. I’ve been chased for a long time before we met. You, your family, showed me how it felt to have a home. How could I put you all on risk?”

“You couldn’t,” you swallowed loudly, feeling the gulp in your throat. “Ugh, come here.”

He obeyed your command and sat beside you; you instinctively put your arms around his neck and held him close, your body trembling as you started crying, realising all the emotions that have been inside you for a long time; you have been bottling them up since the day he left.

“Hey, beautiful, it’s okay,” Arthur whispered to your ear and pecked you on the neck a few times. “You have no idea how much I missed you. Couldn’t stop thinking when you would be in my arms again.”

“Right back at you,” you chuckled through tears and pulled away to look at him. “I just… I just want to be mad at you but when you look at me with those eyes of yours I… I can’t.”

“Lucky me then,” he laughed. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I truly am and I know it’s gonna take some time for you to forgive me…”

“It depends,” you said. “You’re gonna have some time to show you how much you missed me. But before that, promise me that you will never leave me again.”

“I promise,” he replied immediately and you noticed his hand reaching out to the pocket of his jeans and pulling out a beautiful silver ring with a small crystal on it.

“Arthur…”

“I wasn’t planning on doing it now,” he said as he moved to the floor and kneeled on his knee in front of you. “I wanted it to be more romantic. I wanted to talk to your brother first, but he thwarted my plan. At least, I managed to talk to your father so I guess it will have to be enough.”

“Arthur, get up from the floor…”

“I don’t want to leave you ever again and I mean it, Y/N,” he continued, ignoring your ask, “so will you do me that honour and marry me?”

“Yes,” you agreed and let him put a ring on your finger; it shone lightly in the darkness as the only source of light in your bedroom were two candles on the night shelves, but you did not mind that. The ring was absolutely beautiful and the moment Arthur put in on your finger, you thought you would never take it off.

“I love you,” he confessed to you as you embraced his face gently, brushing his cheeks with your thumbs.

“I love you too, Arthur,” you told him and then dared to steal a light kiss from you. “What did my father said to you when you told him about your plan?”

“He blessed the idea of taking you as my wife,” he moved from the ground and with one hand he lifted you, placing you further on the bed as he hovered over you. “He also suggests we should change the barn for a better place for… You know, having sex and stuff.”

“Oh god,” you felt your cheeks turning red. “Arthur, why are you laughing? He didn’t say so, did he?”

“Of course, he didn’t, but you should’ve seen your face,” Arthur burst out laughing and covered his face in your hair.

“You’re really getting on my nerves, Morgan. One more stupid joke and you’re sleeping on the ground,” you threatened him and he seemed to understand you were not joking.

“Yes ma’am,” he got serious again as he laid down next to you and reached out for your hand. “Future wife, I mean.”

Future wife. How lovely did that sound?

***

The morning came quickly and you woke up by Arthur’s side when the first light came through the window; you let yourself look at him for a moment, enjoying how calm he looked when he was asleep. You brushed away the strand of his hair that was falling on his forehead and he purred quietly but did not wake up.

You went downstairs dressed in Arthur’s shirt he had taken off before you went to sleep, and still, you could not believe all that happened during last twenty-four hours was real; even though the ring was still shining on your finger, it all seemed so surreal.

“Good morning, sweetheart,” your father greeted you as you showed up in the kitchen with a grin on your face. “I see someone here has a pretty good mood.”

“Indeed,” you replied and put two cups of coffee on the table; one for you and the second for your dad and then sit on the chair. “Arthur surprised me last night…”

“I know,” your father put down the newspaper and grabbed a cup that was standing in front of him. “This ring looks beautiful on your finger. Your mother would be thrilled if she was here.”

“Yeah,” you got saddened at the thought of her not being here with you, but you quickly shook off this feeling, focusing on your father. “But you’re here, dad. I hope you don’t have anything against it…”

“He had balls big enough to come to me yesterday after we had dealt with James and told me he can’t imagine his life without you in it,” Thomas said. “How could I have anything against this marriage? This man loves you, Y/N and as long as you feel the same about him, I’m happy for you. Both of you.”

“Thank you, it means a lot to me,” you said and graced your father with a wide smile. “Dad… What did you do to James? I mean, I hope you didn’t…”

“Oh, my sweet child,” your father sighed. “Do you really think of us this way? We just had a talk… You know, a men’s kind of talk. He’s a kid of my best friend and I think his own father will make his life a living hell when he finds out what his son has done. Anyway, don’t bother your pretty head with it.”

“Okay,” you nodded. “I won’t be asking any more questions about it. By the way, have you seen this girl… Sadie?”

“Yes, she’s talking with Jaime outside,” your father shook his head in disbelief. “Your brother just couldn’t sit down for a day and wait till his leg will get better. He prefers hobbling rather than healing properly it seems. I hope this girl will talk some sense in him, cause I swear…”

“I’m gonna go and talk to him,” you stated, getting up from the chair.

Your father did not manage to answer as you left him quickly, wanting to talk to Jaime immediately. What was he thinking? He was supposed to get some rest, not walking around, not talking to some other girl while Bonnie… You stopped, realising that maybe you should not be the one to decide who your brother was talking to. It would make you just like him; possessive and jealous. These were the reasons why you were fighting when you met Arthur; you did not want to fight with him again, especially when everything was eventually starting to get better. But Bonnie…

Bonnie was your best friend, but at the same time, she was an adult. If she wanted Jaime back, she should have let him know about it by now. Besides, you did not even know if she wanted him back; nor you did not know if Jaime and Sadie even liked each other, for god’s sake, they were just talking. You did not know that; not until you saw them laughing at the porch and looking at each other the way that could not be misinterpreted.

“Jaime,” you said as you stood behind them, “you should be in bed.”

“You know I can’t stay long in one place,” he replied and turned his head towards you. “Don’t worry about me, pumpkin.”

“But I do worry about you and dad worries about you, so please, get some rest,” you insisted.

“I’m restin— Is that a ring on your finger?” he asked and his eyes widened in shock. Oh, yeah, he had no idea about last night. “And is that Arthur’s shirt?”

“Jaime, I… Arthur proposed to me last night,” you explained to him.

“Oh… Congratulations,” he replied in a stone-cold voice. “The ring is lovely.”

“What’s going on, Jaime?” you asked, realising something was wrong.

“I guess I didn’t expect that,” he told you. “At least not right now. Sadie, sorry for that, I…”

“I understand,” she responded and patted his arm. “I will leave you two alone.”

And so she did. You approached your brother and stopped in front of him, waiting for him to say something to you. He did not. He was just standing there, his eyes turned towards the ranch, not you. He was thinking of what to say while you were dying to hear it.

“I hope he won’t hurt you this time,” he said eventually. “I want to believe so, anyway, but… I can’t shake this feeling… Isn’t that too soon?”

“Brother,” you sighed. “Just be happy for me. I’m happy and I don’t want to think about what might happen. I want to focus on what is now… And now I’m the luckiest girl alive with my fiancé sleeping upstairs and my brother standing under the front of me alive and well.”

“Oh, pumpkin,” Jaime chuckled and leaned down to kiss your forehead, brushing the back of your head with his hand. “I just don’t want anyone to hurt you and I can’t stop being this overprotective brother you think I am.”

“I don’t think, I know it, Jaime,” you pulled away and looked at him the way only you could look at your brother; with pure, platonic love. “Now go, get some rest. For me.”

“For you,” he agreed.

“Jaime…”

“Hm?”

“Are you and Sadie… I know you just met her, but… Do you like her?” you had asked him before he managed to leave.

“Why do you ask?” he furrowed his brows.

“I… It’s not my business, but I think you should know that Bonnie still has some sorta feelings for you,” you told him. “You do what you want. I just thought… You might want to know that.”

“Thanks,” he smiled comfortingly. “But I think this ship has already sailed.”

“Okay,” you nodded and swallowed loudly, watching him hobbling and disappearing inside the house.

Maybe you should not have told him, maybe it would not change anything after all, but he knew and whatever he was gonna do with this information was up to him.

You did a good thing.

Or at least you thought you did.

**Author's Note:**

> Each comment and every kudos are truly appreciated. ❤️ Thank you for reading :)


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